Are you one of those dog lovers who lives to make your furry friend the epitome of a pampered pet? When you see a new pet product, do you unabashedly pull out the credit card because your pawed pal deserves only the very best? Well, we’ve got news for you! Some of those “must-haves” are pet products that will only make your dog hate you. Here are the top 10 offenders.
1. Rear Gear Butt Cover
Yep, that’s right, if you don’t like the way your dog’s rear looks, there’s a butt cover for it. What? Seriously folks, let your dog be a dog, look like a dog and not be laughed at by other dogs (or people, for that matter)!
2. Bubbletastic Bacon Bubble Blower
How do you like to be pranked when it comes to your favorite food? It sounds fun, but no dog wants to think you’re bringing home the bacon treats only to find out the floating bacon-scented bubble is nothing but smelly air.
3. Pet Paint
For the pet owner who thinks her pet should share her propensity for visiting the hair salon, Pet Paint is long-lasting colored hair spray that is sure to make your dog or cat loathe your existence. Just look at the Pet Paint poster dog in the picture; it clearly hates looking like an American flag, and your pet will, too.
4. Dog Nail Polish
We can assure you that your pet isn’t as concerned for its nails as you are. Is that pricey supply of OPI Dog Nail Pawlish or Pawdicure Polish Pens helping your dog keep up with the Boneses or is it for you to flaunt her around so you can keep up with the Joneses?
5. Poo Trap Magic Poo Collector
We simply have no words — and need no words — to explain why your dog hates you for the Poo Trap.
6. Dog Wine
Seriously? You’ve become such a wino that you need to make your dog act like one, too? Pinot Tail-io, Bark-deaux, Char-Dog-Nay and Grr-lot sure sound cute, but your sober pup isn’t impressed with canine wine and wishes you’d spend more time going to the park than tipping back your bottle.
7. Pet Chime
We completely understand that your dog’s habitual barking and scratching at the door is rather annoying. Your dog, however, does not understand why you won’t simply let her be a dog. She isn’t a human and she hates that you’re forcing her to quietly ring the doggy doorbell to go outside.
8. Pet Corrector
According to your dog, another name for the Pet Corrector is “ear-bleeding bull horn.” You don’t like it when your furry friend loudly barks unexpectedly and now he doesn’t like you because you terrify him with a loud blast from that red can. Every time you blow it, he wants to rip one of your legs off.
9. Fursions Dog Cologne
If you’re too lazy to bathe your pup, live with his natural canine odor. He doesn’t want to smell like a Giorgio cologne sampler. And it’s kind of weird that you actually want him to wear canine cologne.
10. Pet Sweep
Even if your dog is classified in the working dog breed group by the American Kennel Club, we can assure you that she doesn’t want to suffer because of your domestic laziness. The Pet Sweep Animal Debris Removal System may look so cute and seem so incredibly efficient, but secretly your sweet dog is plotting your death for making her run around the house in dust boots. Get off the couch and clean up your own messes, already!