Sex after baby: Will it ever be good again?

After your ladybits have undergone the worst trauma they’ve ever experienced in your young life, you might find yourself wondering, “Will I ever really want to have sex again?” Postpartum sex can be extremely painful at worst and… well, fairly uncomfortable at best. But don’t give up hope yet. Time heals all wounds, and yes, even your lackluster libido will get back to normal again. Learn more tips on postpartum intimacy and turn the heat up in your bedroom again.

What’s happening to my libido?

New motherhood comes with lots of big changes and new responsibilities. When you are surviving on a few hours of sleep each night and the last time your changed your yoga pants and spit-up covered T-shirt was three days ago, sex simply may not be your top priority right now — and that’s okay. Remember, you’ve just gone through a radical change in your life and you are still adjusting both emotionally and physically. Give yourself time to recover before you pressure yourself to add anything else to your plate.

Don’t worry, you’re not the only one asking yourself, “Is our sex life over forever?” >>

But, I don’t feel sexy

If you are used to being fit and in tip top shape, it’s normal to feel less confident with your postpartum body. Learn to love the new you. Don’t get too caught up in comparing yourself to other women, especially celebrity moms who appear in all their air-brushed glory on the covers of your favorite magazines. It took nine months for your body to expand enough to grow a baby and it can take nine months for it to return back to its pre-pregnancy shape.

Get your body back with the best postpartum fitness tips for new moms >>

Bring back the magic

Even if you don’t feel ready (emotionally or physically) to have sex with your partner again, that doesn’t mean you can’t bring the magic back. There are lots of ways to be close and intimate without intercourse. Give each other massages, try sensual couples’ yoga, have a steamy night in the Jacuzzi or go to the movies and make out like teenagers again. Take the time to get reacquainted and enjoy the intimacy of the new role you are taking on together as parents to your newborn baby.

Rekindle the heat in your bedroom with sensual postpartum sex tips >>

When can we have sex again?

Got your mojo back already? Hubba hubba! Just make sure that your body has had time to heal before you hit the sheets. For normal, vaginal deliveries, you will still want to wait at least four weeks (and sometimes up to six if you’ve had an episiotomy or vaginal tearing) before having intercourse again. For C-sections, you should wait at least six weeks, or until after your first postpartum visit so your obstetrician has an opportunity to examine you and determine if your body is ready.

Find out if tonight’s the night. 6 week sex: Is your body ready? >>

Get it On

Woman on top is a good position where you can be in control of the depth of penetration.

Best postpartum sex positions

Ready for sexy time, but a little nervous about causing pain to your healing body? Try positions where you are in charge. Woman on top is a good position where you can be in control of the depth of penetration. If you’ve had a C-section, try positions that don’t put pressure on your incision site like spooning or hands and knees. You might also notice that you are not feeling as moist as usual. Hormonal changes and breastfeeding can cause vaginal dryness, so make sure to stock up on some sensual lube to get things heated up. Take things slow and enjoy yourselves. You’ll have that sizzle back before you know it.

6 tips to restart your sex drive after baby >>

Watch this video for more about intimacy after pregnancy

More on sex after baby

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Bring back the romance after having a baby
Tips for feeling sexy after baby


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