What I would say to myself as a first time mother

As a veteran mom of four, I imagine what it would be like if I could send a letter to my first time mom self. Oh to have the power! Check out what I’d say to myself if I had that time machine working in my favor.


There are days now, with four children (one of which is still a tiny baby), where I dream a little (ok a lot) about going back

in time a bit. It’s not so I can go back a decade and be a young 20-something just for fun, it’s so I can have a talk with my 20-something soon-to-be-a-mother self and beg her to listen.

Entering into my 35th year, 10 years of being a mother, I am finally learning lessons that I wish I had known from the start of this wild ride.

My letter to my first-time-mom-self

PenDear Me,

You are about to embark on something really, really amazing. You know this, but do you know how hard it will be? Start right now and journal. No, not the kind of journaling you’ve been doing where you quit after a week, but a for real journal. When you’re turning 35 you will want to read this and remember how far you’ve come. You might even want to start a blog (they become a really popular thing to do).

Value right now

I almost hate to tell you this, but I have to: You are going to have some hard times ahead. Some very hard times. You don’t know this yet, but you will know what it’s like to live with postpartum depression and autism and you will know what it’s like to lose a child. These experiences will change every fiber of you, and you need that change. Instead of being afraid, be grateful for the now. Each second with these children is priceless, even the screamy ones.

Learn more about treating post partum depression >>

Do what your mama taught you

It’s time to be a grown up, because waiting until your 35th year is a very unseemly time to finally enter adulthood. Learn family routines now, learn how to cook, learn how to sew. Don’t isolate yourself when life gets hard.

Read more tips for avoiding new mom isolation >>

Go easy on your body

Your body is going to be handling a lot in the coming decade. Really, can you just take some time to sleep? You have seriously no idea what the sleep deprivation is going to do to your brain. And that first baby? He will be the worst sleeper of them all. Start learning about natural ways to heal your body, and do them. Eat better. Exercise more. You will be a few (ahem) pounds more in a decade, and it would be really great if you just avoided those cupcakes for now. Trust me, you’ll thank me later.

Love, Me

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