So, your best friend is preggers for the third time and you want to throw her a shower. But receiving boatloads of tiny baby clothes and playing games like “Taste the Baby Food and Guess Which Disgusting Flavor It Is” and “Mummify the Ginormous Pregnant Lady with 18 Rolls of Toilet Paper” probably aren’t going to be top of her list. Because by the time you are on your third child, the last thing any mom wants to do at a party is make other people eat baby food and pick up 18 rolls of toilet paper remains. (Because that is what we spend 75% of our days doing anyway.) What to do?
Mother the mother
How about throwing her a party that is all about honoring her and welcoming her new baby? Because, let’s face it, she deserves it. DONA certified doula and lactation assistant Rosemary Walker says, “Mothering the mother is a very important part of the birthing journey. In our culture, moms tend to be showered with material things rather than love and support. Throwing a third-time mom a party to honor her as a mother and as a person is a beautiful way to demonstrate your support for her upcoming transformation.” There are lots of creative and fun activities that you can do at a party like this. Here are a few suggestions to get you started:
Give her a baby wish box
Ask all the guests ahead of time to find a small object to symbolize their hopes and dreams for her baby. This might be a pressed leaf for love of nature. A packet of glitter for joyfulness. A poem or letter written especially for the baby. A meaningful photograph. At the shower, each guest gets a chance to put her symbol into the treasure box in turn and explain what the symbol means and why.
Do some belly painting
Hire a face-painting artist who will craft something truly magnificent on mommy’s belly. If that sounds too expensive for your group, just get some face paint from your local craft store and have the guests get creative. Afterwards, give everyone a chance to explain what they painted and why. Or just take some photos and admire the belly-tastic results.
Make a birth necklace
Choose some beautiful beads and have the guests work together to string a special necklace for your friend to wear during her birth. While stringing the beads, give each guest a turn to say something meaningful to the new mommy. Validate her mothering and remind her of all the beautiful ways she gives of herself to her children each day. When she goes into labor, she can wear the necklace for strength as she faces her birth journey.
Get jiggy with it
Hire a dance teacher and learn a new style of dance together. Maybe your friend has always wanted to learn to dance salsa or hip hop. Find a good teacher and do a fun class together. There is nothing better than watching a pregnant lady learn to Shake Ya Tailfeather and do the Wutang. I promise.
Buy her one gift that she really needs. Like new underwear. (Because you know by now her panties have seen better days.) Or a truckload of diapers. Or a visit from a housecleaning service. Have everyone pitch in so it isn’t overly expensive for one person and make the single gift really special and unique.
Give the gift of food
Have all the guests bring a frozen meal for her to put in the freezer for after the baby comes. Also bring a sign-up sheet so that friends can bring fresh dinners to her family during the first few weeks after the birth. There is nothing that says ‘I love you’ to a new mom like food.
Think about your friend and what she really enjoys and loves. Don’t be confined by traditional baby shower activities. Do some belly dancing. Have a meditation. Sing karaoke. Do some silly birth improv skits. Get a group pedicure. Show her in whatever way you want that she is special and that you admire her as a person, friend and mother. And if that involves wrapping her in 18 rolls of toilet paper, so be it.
>>Do you have any non-traditional baby shower ideas? Share them in the comments section below!