Having the first baby was a simple decision for us. For the second baby, the decision was a little more complicated. We had to consider if we were ready for a second and if we could afford another child — both in terms of emotional support and financial means. However, deciding to have a third child comes with even more considerations.
Thinking about having a third child? A lot of people these days stop at one or two due to finances and other concerns, but some still want the big story book family. I certainly do.
It happens to me almost every year — aside from the ones where I was actually pregnant. The summer air hits me in just the right way and I start thinking baby, baby, baby . . . June was the month I convinced my husband that we should have both of our children. And now, June is the month I am thinking about trying to convince him to have number three. But, are we ready for number three?
This time, the stakes are higher. I have no doubt that we could love another baby as much as the first two. However the financial aspect of having a third child is pretty big. And on another level, it keeps us in the young child years longer — something that worries my husband.
Having a third child tips the scales on the job situation for one parent. With one, it’s usually pretty easy to have two working parents. With two, it becomes harder. With three, it’s downright costly — and sometimes too much so.
A third baby may mean that a family needs to survive on one income or one parent needs to work at home. Can your career handle that?
Children are stressful. When they hit the troublesome terrible two’s or three’s, they are a big challenge to control and teach to do the right thing. And each time you have another baby, that means a few more years of phrases like “No, nothing goes in your mouth but food” and “Don’t pull the dog’s tail!”
One of my husband’s chief concerns about having a third child two years apart from our second is that we will be essentially milling children. I don’t agree, but do see his point. Our first two are two years apart. Having our third child two years apart from our second will mean being in diapers for more than seven years without a break. Not to mention the potential for having three in diapers at least part-time all at once. Eek!
Space is at a premium in our house. Having a third would put a greater stress on the need to find more room for our expanding family. Already, our children are supposed to share a small room, however my daughter sleeps with us at the present. A third child would mean that my daughter would move to her room with her brother and the baby would have to room in with my husband and I until we found a space solution.
Could we handle more time bunking with a baby?
Is another in the cards?
So far, we’ve decided to wait on number three. There are a lot of reasons not to have another at this point. But in a few years, that decision might be less complicated.