You may think you know the pettiest mother-in-law, but we promise you that this one takes the cake. Well, she’ll accept the cake if it’s birthday cake. Preferably with a candle. And singing. Lots of singing from everyone she knows. And if it’s not going to be the perfect party with all eyes on her, then forget it! She’ll have a pity party instead.
One man on the Am I The A—hole subreddit explained to the internet that his mom had a birthday coming up and a party planned for that Saturday. On the Thursday evening leading up to the party, this man’s wife, who he is calling “Amelia”, went into labor. Their daughter was then born “during the very early hours” of Monday morning. Did you catch that? Are you rereading? Yup. She was in labor from Thursday to Monday. More than 72 hours, ladies and gentlemen.
“As you can imagine it was a long process and she was exhausted and so was I as I wasn’t sleeping unless she was asleep,” he said.
You’re probably still focusing on the “more than three days of labor” part, right? WELL STOP! Let’s not forget there is an adult woman whose birthday happened during those four days.
“Amelia at this point was in awful pain very consistently, meaning I was constantly by her side doing whatever she needed me to do,” he wrote. “Because of this I just completely forgot it was my mom’s birthday, as I didn’t really look much at my phone. We both agreed before hand that when the time came we would send the initial text that the baby was coming but that would be it, and we wouldn’t respond to any other text until after.”
When his daughter finally arrived, the couple announced it to their families. When OP started replying to old messages, he saw that his mom had texted to say that it was her birthday and then texted some more to say how angry she was that he hadn’t gotten in contact with her.
“So I called her up apologizing but explaining that I genuinely forgot and it wasn’t intentional,” he wrote. “She went on to blame my wife by saying she purposely went into labor right around her birthday in order to ‘steal her spotlight from her son.'”
What!!! As you can imagine, Reddit had a field day with that comment.
“It’s cute that your mom thinks your wife is talented enough to go into labor on command,” one user said.
“And no woman in their right mind would ensure she’s in labor for like 3.5 days,” said another. “What is wrong with your mom?”
And then one commenter let the cat out of the bag:
“Every woman can do this. We just have to think really really hard! And have an eviction notice … and it must be a full moon … oh and don’t forget to dance around a lemon tree.”
The son rightfully responded to this outrageous display of narcissism by telling his mother that she was to leave his family alone and that she wasn’t welcome at their house for the next few days: “She can wait till she’s over her fit to see her granddaughter.”
*Round of applause*
“My whole family have been calling me an a—hole and that I am a bad son for not remembering my moms birthday, but I’m an even worse son for not letting her meet her grandbaby,” he wrote. “It’s annoying because all we want to do is enjoy our new baby together, just the two of us without anyone being a bother.”
To which Reddit responded with a resounding, “Duh!” Plenty of people ask to be alone with their newborn for a few days even without being prompted by blatant displays of narcissism. If and when OP decides to introduce his mother to her granddaughter, commenters want him to “calmly and firmly” remind her that being a grandparent is “a privilege and not a given right.”
“And if she’s going to be continuously disrespectful towards your wife then she’s only got herself to blame for not meeting your daughter,” they continued. “Your daughter doesn’t need to grow up thinking that it’s ok to be rude and disrespectful towards someone just because they are family.”
There truly is just so much to unpack here. How was this mom only concerned about her birthday and not about the long, difficult, scary labor her daughter-in-law was going through? How was she sending angry texts and not terrified texts? How does she possibly think she is the victim? How does her birthday party matter as much to her as it would to a 5-year-old?
Why is she not excited to have a granddaughter with a birthday so closer to hers? Oh right, because the granddaughter might steal her spotlight.
“Your mom sounds more exhausting than your wife’s labor,” one commenter said, hitting the nail pretty much on the (72+ hours long) head .
Also, how did this mom not see this coming? As one commenter pointed out, it shouldn’t have been a surprise to the mom that the baby would be due around her birthday.
“Planning a big to-do for the bday and then being mad when the (way more important, completely predictable) baby happened just makes it seem like she was just looking for this fight.”
OP jumped in to say his daughter was actually born past her due date, and the internet feels like that was probably for the best.
“And even if your baby came on time, she would be brand new! Had I just given birth, I wouldn’t feel like going to a party much less taking my teeny tiny baby! AND if you and Amelia rallied and took your newborn let’s be real, that baby would get more attention than your mom and she’d be mad! I can picture her now, texting you that Amelia and the baby conspired to ruin her day.”
And let’s not forget, Amelia did not ask for this to happen. If she had access to a lemon tree, she would have scheduled things better. In that same calm and firm voice, one Redditor wants this man to tell his mother that “the blame lays on [her granddaughter].”
“She was going to come when she wanted to, and decided to have some fun with her parents before she made her grand entrance and as such she didn’t care that it was her grandmother’s birthday,” they wrote.
Despite what Grandma might think, they continued, the world doesn’t revolve around her. Especially not now: “Because the new queen in the family has finally arrived.”
Before you go, check out some of Reddit’s wildest baby name dilemmas.
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