Imagine your mother passing away the year before you begin college, being left with a generous inheritance, then being expected to fork it over to your father and his wife, who call you a selfish b*tch when you don’t cave to their audacious demands. That’s what this 17-year-old girl is going through, and the manipulation tactics being used on her are so intense that she’s taken to Reddit’s “Am I The A—hole” forum to reassure herself.
The teen explains that her mom died a little more than a year ago, and prior to her death, they were living together full-time. Her mom’s house and financial assets were left to her, and she plans to move back into the house once she finishes college. Until then, she’s arranged that her maternal aunt will stay at the house while caring for her grandmother.
She goes on to explain that she’s now living with her dad, who she doesn’t “trust … or have a great relationship with.” His household includes his wife, Jan, and her 17-year-old twin daughters, and now the five of them share a 3-bedroom flat.
OP writes that her dad assumed the house was left to her aunt while she received her mom’s financial assets, and she didn’t correct him because of prior mentioned mistrust. She explains that although she didn’t correct him, he somehow found out that her inheritance includes both the house and money, and “Since then I haven’t heard the end of it, I’m selfish for making us all stay in a tiny flat, I’m spoiled because I won’t share my inheritance, I’m a terrible person for making the twins take out loans. You get the gist,” she writes.
Someone give this guy a Dad of the Year award! Guilt-tripping and insulting his daughter, who is likely still grieving the loss of her mom, for not forking over the money and home that was left to her, all for his and his wife’s benefit? What a top-level piece of garbage, trying to weasel his way into taking advantage of his deceased ex’s assets left to their child.
OP shares that the past weekend was the twins’ birthday party, at which her dad’s family, Jan’s family, and some friends of theirs and the twins were present. She writes, “After [the twins] were done opening my present to them they asked me if that was really it. … It got quiet and I asked them what else they were expecting. They said Jan said that I was planning on surprising them on their birthday by telling them we were moving into my mom’s house and helping them with college.”
We can’t decide who’s the more garbage person, OP’s dad or Jan. The audacity they both have is wildly inappropriate, and the manipulation tactic of setting up the lie in a public setting on the twins’ birthday is frankly disgusting. As if you weren’t revolved by Jan enough already, OP writes, “My grandma asked Jan if this was true and Jan started in on me again. She asked what she could do to make me stop being a b*tch, pull my weight, help out, and be fair.” Evil stepmother vibes to the fullest!
“I told her she could drop dead,” the teen explains. “That my mom died for me to get all these things she wanted me to give her daughters. I said if she wanted everything to be fair then she should drop dead and I would share everything I had with her daughters since we would have all lost a mother then. That it would be fair only after that happened. She and my dad started yelling at me and my grandma and uncles started yelling at my dad and Jan and everything was pretty much over after that.”
Honestly, good for her to stand up for herself and call out the circumstance under which her dad and Jan are manipulating her. While we (and Reddit) fully support what OP said, she continued to write, “I was getting texts from Jan’s family, the twins’ friends, and a few of my own cousins saying I was selfish. I don’t usually fight with my cousins so I’m really starting to think maybe I am being selfish and that I went too far at the twins’ party. AITA?”
Redditors flooded the replies with support, with one user succinctly writing, “A rare time when you can tell someone to drop dead and still be NTA.” Another person lent comfort and reassurance, commenting, “OP, Jan was totally out of line. Greedy, insensitive, and manipulative. Your answer was perfect. Don’t second guess yourself. Your dad and Jan should be ashamed.”
They continued, “You have money. Many people will tell you how to spend it. Ignore them. Save your money for your needs and life goals. Your mom left it to you. Kindness and gifts are fine, modest charitable giving is laudable. But you are young with a long life ahead of you.”
Another Redditor who also lost their parent wrote to OP, “Majorly NTA. OP I lost my mum when I was 9 and got the house and stuff as well. I didn’t go through what you are currently, but I have had the issues with people wanting me to share my ‘fortune’ with them. I’d have given it all up just to have my mum back. You are not alone and never forget that.”
Others applauded the teen for standing her ground, with one user commenting, “As I was reading this I thought, I would have completely caved at that age. Proud of you, OP!” We’re super proud of the young woman as well, and we wish her all the best as she begins her journey into adulthood — hopefully without her dad and Jan in the picture.
Before you go, check out these unbelievable stories about Reddit’s worst dads.
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