What’s the best way to handle a situation where you’re being shamed for breastfeeding? One mom came up with her own creative solution. She took to Reddit’s AITA forum to share an interaction she had with her brother-in-law while they were out to dinner.
“We all got invited out for my dads birthday dinner, and obviously I took my little ones with me. While there my baby got hungry and I fed her, as one does,” the mom explained. “Afterwards my BIL mentioned how ‘things like that’ make him uncomfortable, and asked if I’d cover up if baby nursed while eating. I told him no, and we ordered.”
Her baby became hungry a second time so she proceeded to breastfeed again. The brother-in-law grew more frustrated. He commented that he did not want to “see a boob” while he was eating. “Sorry, I’ll just get this covered for you,” the mom responded … and flung the blanket she had on her lap over his head.
The reddit user was pleased with her actions. “I’m still proud of myself for managing it tbh,” she wrote. “Even if it was an a**hole move, it was a damn good throw.”
“I personally am not super sure I was in the wrong, as my wife nor anyone we’ve told thinks so, but they all tend to be quite nice to me post baby due to hormones,” she added. “I also can’t tell if it’s my hormones making me feel like a sh*tty person.” The mom turned to Reddit for a verdict.
Some agreed that she was, indeed, the a-hole. Some told her she was being petty, and therefore a bad mother. Her own dad called her immature. The overwhelming consensus, though — particularly from parents — was that there was nothing wrong with how she handled the situation.
“He doesn’t get to infringe upon your rights because he can’t handle himself,” one person wrote. “Also that is a legendary move that I as a breastfeeding mom, have only dreamt of doing.” Another added this savvy bit of observation: “He didn’t specify what needed covering, so you did what was best for you and your baby yet prevented him from seeing a boob. Heck, for a while the whole table didn’t have to see a boob! Tell your family that if they have a problem with it, they can eat in the bathroom. If they take umbrage to that, say it’s what they’d rather your baby do.”
Some detailed their own experiences with being shamed for publicly feeding their children. “NTA. I always covered while nursing but was told once that it wasn’t enough,” a user commented. “Just the sound of the baby eating was enough to cause my friend’s husband to think about boobs and boobs mean sex so babies should be fed in private. I wish I could go back in time to advocate for myself.
What are your thoughts? Did this mom do the right thing?
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