Hormones and tensions can both run high during any pregnancy, but they can get especially ramped up when pregnancy includes infertility issues and surrogacy. Things can get even more complicated when you toss family into the mix as well. Redditor SpiritualTea640 learned as much when a day out registering for baby items ahead of the birth of her nibling ended in tears for her sister.
SpiritualTea640 (35F), who has volunteered as a gestational carrier for her sister (30F), took to the popular AITA subreddit earlier this week to explain how she ended up screaming at her younger sister while shopping.
“My sister [has] some fertility issues and is not able to have a safe pregnancy,” 640 wrote. “I offered to carry the baby for her and her husband.”
640 added that she’s almost seven months along and everything has been going well, but her sister has been behaving like she is pregnant during this time as well.
“At first it was just small things, like having her husband run out to get food she was ‘craving,’ but it developed into things like wearing maternity wear,” she wrote. “She also gets annoyed if I talk about my cravings or pregnancy symptoms around her.”
While those things seemed odd, the Redditor said that she didn’t really have a problem with it at first. It wasn’t until the two went out to complete the baby registry together that things got heated. OP said that they spent the day going from store to store, and by the last retailer she was wiped out. “I must have looked exhausted because as we were waiting the salesperson brought over a chair for me to sit while the registry paperwork was done,” she wrote. “When she brought it over, she did say something like, ‘Here’s a chair for Mom.’ I didn’t correct the salesperson this time and just sat down.”
Once the salesperson walked away the two began to argue over who the chair was intended for. “She said that this was her registry appointment and how dare I act like this was all about me. She said she was the one who was the expectant mother and that she needed to sit down now.” Things dissolved into tears when OP said she snapped at her sister and told her that she wasn’t actually the one who was pregnant.
The whole scene unfolded within earshot of other shoppers and staff, and 640 wrote that everyone looked at her like she was the monster. Even her own mother told her that she should have just given up the seat, leaving OP wondering if she really was the asshole for making such a big deal over a chair.
The responses were almost unanimously in support of OP. “NTA at all, but it sounds like your sister may need therapy,” wrote Asshole Enthusiast.
“It sounds like sis is having severe insecurity issues,” wrote Ecstatic_Big1811. “She is completely ignoring the fact that the salesperson brought the chair because pregnancy can be physically painful and exhausting, not because the parent needs a throne to sit on.”
And more than one user pointed out the potential for an unhappy ending for the sisters.
“Imagine when the baby is born,” wrote Maru3792648. “The sister may cut OP out of their lives because she’ll be constantly reminded that she didn’t give birth.”
This sounds like a complex situation for everyone involved, and we really hope that the two sisters can talk through everything before the baby arrives —and before any permanent damage is done to their relationship.
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