Considering the long and infuriating history of people asking women to cover up when they breastfeed their children, we are no longer surprised by the strange outrage an exposed breast inflicts on strangers. But we rarely expect the offended onlooker to be the father of the nursing baby. And yet here we are, reading a Reddit post from a dad who wonders why his wife won’t just cover her boobs when he feels uncomfortable.
“She tried it a few times with a covering but said she felt like the baby didn’t latch and feed as well, which I find hard to believe, but I asked her to keep trying because it would probably take time to get used to a new routine for them both,” continued this man who has, we assume, never tried to feed another human from his own breast. “She told me she didn’t want to try anymore and wanted to go back to how things were, but I told her that I still felt the same way and didn’t know if I would feel comfortable being around her when she did this if she was going to keep doing it without a covering. That is when she called me an asshole and we had a fight.”
Cautious_Jury told the Reddit community he didn’t think it was unreasonable for his wife to consider how uncomfortable her breasts made him and some hypothetical other people feel.
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“Ataların bilgeliğiyle donanmış bir kadın durdurulamaz bir güç.” 💫(@gen.ev.eve) Anneler Istmo de Tehuantepec in Oaxaca, Meksika “A woman armed with ancestral wisdom is an unstoppable force.” 💫(@gen.ev.eve) Mothers from Istmo de Tehuantepec in Oaxaca, Mexico. #empoweringwomen#motherhood#breastfeeding#life#love
If you’re already imagining an onslaught of biting responses from breastfeeding parents and those who love them, you are correct. It is a sheer joy to read this thread, in our completely unbiased opinion. But we’ll share a sampling of the best for you here:
“Let me get this straight — she says the baby isn’t latching and feeding as well, but you and your useless nipples decide that can’t be true,” KerrieJune wrote. “So then you ask her to keep trying something that makes her uncomfortable because of your comfort level. You are uncomfortable with breasts being used for their intended purpose.”
Immediately, everyone mentally filed “useless nipples” for future insult use.
“Haven’t you heard? Useless nipples are superior. It’s why they can be shown, but the ones with potential function/ actually functioning cannot,” NakedandALaid replied.
“I don’t think you’d eat as well with a blanket thrown over your head either, although it would probably be a more pleasant experience for the rest of us,” AcingSpades wrote.
“She doesn’t have to cover herself for the sake of you or anyone else’s comfort,” pxstlaa said. “It’s so sad that you as the father of her child aren’t supportive of her feeding her child. Stop sexualizing her breasts.”
Many chimed in to inform this dad of how much his wife could use encouragement rather than criticism right about now.
“Breastfeeding is HARD,” ubergeek64 said. “It was by far my least favourite part of motherhood. If my husband didn’t support me through it, and instead shamed me and made me feel like I was being disrespectful to people around me… I would have flat out divorced him. How dare you?!?!”
But it seems Cautious Jury has doubled down on his stance. When VastEggplant asked, “Why don’t you go wait in the men’s bathroom until she’s done feeding the baby?” the dad replied that he has decided to go somewhere else while his wife breastfeeds in public.
“Me walking away isn’t intended to do anything except work as a compromise so she can do what she thinks is best, and I [can] respectfully remove myself from that situation since it makes me uncomfortable and I don’t really agree with it,” he wrote.
For the wife’s sake, we hope that’s the only time this dad decides to walk away when parenting gets difficult or uncomfortable.
For the kind of covering up you should be doing in public, shop these kids face masks from Black-owned brands.