Sarah Buckley Friedberg, get in our purse. Friedberg wrote a pitch-perfect rant on Facebook on April 18 headed “Society to working moms” — and, oh, did it ever hit its mark. The post went viral, garnering over 55,000 likes and 54,000 shares from mothers who related to Friedberg’s hilarious-but-painful laundry list of impossible standards. From the frustration of living life as a “poop doula,” to the heavy burden of emotional labor from serving as Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, and the family scheduler — that and being expected to have a Pinterest-poppin’ household at all times — Friedberg has had it, people. She is done. Like, well-done to charred. You can read the whole viral mom-standards post here.
We winced especially hard when we read her words on the absurd cruelty of lack of proper maternity leave in the U.S.
“Go back to work before you have finished healing or have had time to bond with your baby. Keep your mind on work, and not your tiny helpless baby that is being watched and cared for by someone other than you. Make sure to break the glass ceiling and excel at your job — you can do anything a man can do! It is your job to show society this! Show the world that women can do it all. Rise to the top of your career,” Friedberg wrote.
Damn straight, sister. Like it’s that easy.
We so get it. Like, we really get it, and we’re not one bit surprised Friedberg touched a nerve. After all, don’t most moms really just want a day off — even one Mother’s Day to be blisfully alone? But how many actually ask for it? The perfect Pinterest mom spends Mother’s Day surrounded by her loving kids, crafting pom-pom votive holders, right?
Friedberg’s voice is so relatable, it’s hard not to want to crawl through the laptop screen and hug her hard:
“Birthday parties coming up? Make sure to have presents! Ensure the kids are learning to swim, play an instrument, read, ride a bike, be a good human being, eat vegetables, wear sunscreen, drink enough water, say please and thank you. Don’t forget they need to dress as their favorite book character on Monday, and wear something yellow on Thursday,” she writes. “Oh it’s totally your call but most parents come in on their birthday and read to the entire class. In case nobody told you, if you have more than one kid you will need to buy new shoes approximately every other day. See also: winter coats, shorts, pants that aren’t 4 inches too short. There will never be matching socks or gloves for any member of the family, ever again.”
There will never be matching socks or gloves, and there will never be sanity, but we are grateful for fellow moms like Friedberg who aren’t afraid to keep things really effing real and buck the “lean in” trend. Sometimes, you have to have something to lean on before you can lean in. And many of us — partnered or not — are pretty much flying solo.