Bekah Martinez of The Bachelor — arguably the most interesting human to ever appear on the series, along with her Bachelor BFF Kendall Long the soulful taxidermist — still has tongues wagging. This time around, the trolls are out in droves judging her for a sweet post the new mom shared of her waiting for her baby girl to finish breastfeeding so Martinez could enjoy a single glass of wine at sunset.
For those of you who pricked your finger on a poison spinning wheel cursed by a witch and just woke up, blissfully free of all pop-culture residue from the past 100 years, know this: Martinez did not — we repeat — did not procreate with her season’s (yaawwwwwwwn) Bachelor, Arie Luyendyk Jr. She was outta there, no rose needed, thanks, because Luyendyk could barely carry a conversation and Martinez could throw down philosophy like last week’s tabloid fodder. Nope, not that guy: Martinez and her non-Bachelor franchise beau, Grayston Leonard, a fellow climber, welcomed their baby girl Ruthie May on Feb. 2. We approve of this sparkling DNA combo.
Anyway: the pic. Martinez posted the gorgeous shot on her Instagram feed with this caption: “Sunset vibes from this weekend … I was waiting patiently for her to finish nursing before beginning my (single!) glass of wine :).”
I mean, honestly, what is there to hate about this photo?
That, of course, is a rhetorical question in 2019, because in 2019, there’s apparently plenty to hate, and any online troll worth their wizened soul in vitriol will tell you what they think is “wrong” here (quotation marks all ours, do not miss them):
- OMG MOM WITH BOOB OUT OMG SLUT SHOW OMG PUT A BLANKET ON YOUR HEAD
- OMG MOM NURSING WHILE HOLDING WINE WHY DON’T YOU JUST SMOTHER YOUR BABY TO DEATH YOU FIEND
- OMG MOM HOLDING WINE WHERE IS THE PATRIARCHY TO CHASTISE THIS WANTON BRAZEN LUSH AND LOCK HER INTO A STOCKADE
Yes, there were commenters who tried to stick their fingers in the cracking dam holding back the hell rush of judgers and haters, like this good, sane soul: “Before all the haters spew hatred about drinking wine and nursing:
“Drinking wine actually helps promote letdown since it relaxes you! My OBGYN is all about having a glass of wine for nursing mommas. Drink on momma. Cheers.”
But as you have probably guessed, more of the comments read like these charmers.
“Why are you always drinking and breastfeeding???????????”
“Just stop breastfeeding. If you can’t commit to your daughter well being gezzzz”
“She does this for the comments and attention. Come on people.”
“She’s doing this to get a rise out of everyone just so she can act like some self righteous defensive hippy. She preaches about everything under God’s green earth but it’s okay when SHE breast feeds while drinking …”
“Do you….but it just doesn’t look good. Glad my daughter didn’t take pics like this with either of my grandchildren. *fyi…Native American children are taken and put in foster homes for these kind of things. Be glad you’re privledged [sic] and that won’t happen to you. Hater’s are gonna hate my comment but it’s true.”
Um. There’s a lot to unpack in that one. We’re gonna tiptoe through the mud to the next batch:
“Doesn’t drinking alcohol kill brain cells and why take a chance with a young brain that is not developed”
Other comments on the nursing post include:
“Attack me for my question, call me names, I don’t care! The safest option is always NOT to drink! I would never do that to my children! CIAO.”
“In my opinion, NO mother should ever drink & breastfeed. Yes, I will Judge the hell out of you for that. that’s horrible. Do y’all need a drink that damn bad? Your child is only an infant for a very short time if you can’t refrain from drinking — that’s a problem.”
Actually, now we really do need a drink that damn bad, lady. Because whatever happened to women fixing each other’s crowns, huh? Women lifting women up? That was the deal for 2019: We were going to fix each other’s effing crowns, not tear them off and smash each other’s wine glasses with them. The best (read: the absolute worst) part of all of this is that there were even comments asking where baby Ruthie’s dad was, as if it’s his job to police Mama Bekah. Um, no.
Everybody just breathe. Imagine a world in which nobody ever judged you, ever again. Imagine the glorious peace and serenity of a life like that. If that appeals to you, if you want that for your own kids: Stop hating on other parents — because your kids are paying attention, and becoming exactly like you. Sometimes a glass of wine after a nursing session is just a damn glass of wine. And chances are fantastic that anyone you’re hating on loves their baby just as much as you love yours.