It’s a fact of life that kids love snacks, so it isn’t exactly surprising that they ask for them often. Hey, we get it — who doesn’t love a little early afternoon tangelo? But the thing about kids that never seems to fail is the precision with which they ask for snacks at the most ridiculous moments.
My kids like snacks so much that we joke they are part Hobbit. If they had their druthers, they’d enjoy first breakfast and second breakfast and… you get the picture.
Basically, fielding snack requests has become second nature in our household. If that rings true to you (which, let’s be real, what mom can’t relate?), the following craziest times kids ask their parents to cough up a snack will undoubtedly resonate.
1. First thing in the morning
If you’re, ahem, blessed with an early riser, the refrain, “Can I have a snack?” pretty much serves as a secondary alarm clock. And no matter how many times you say, “No,” “Just five more minutes” or “It’s called breakfast, kid,” there’s little you can do to deter a perky morning kid seeking a sunrise snack.
2. When you’re stuck in traffic with no snack in sight
If there’s one thing you can count on, it’s that if you get stuck in traffic with little ones without a snack on hand, they’ll become irrationally hungry and demand sustenance in the form of snacks. Of course, since you weren’t born with the ability to shoot pretzels out of your fingertips, you get the pleasure of chilling in gridlock while your kids serenade you with pleas.
3. While they’re in the bathtub
Hey, all that splishin’ and splashin’ is hard work — in kid logic, that requires refueling. But, uh, no. No, you cannot have your snack in the bathtub, where it is sure to get waterlogged or clog up the drain or wind up all over you like edible paper-mache. Just, no.
4. Or better yet, while they’re using the bathroom
Oh, the things you say when you’re a parent that you never thought you’d say. Like, for instance, “No, son, I will not bring you a snack while you poop.” And while you’d like to think such utterances are few and far between, well, you’d be kidding yourself.
5. When they are filthy
Your kid comes in from an intense playtime session, and seemingly every inch of their little body is covered with dirt and grime. Their fingernails harbor so much dirt it looks as though they’ve tunneled to the core of the Earth. Not an inch of their face is free from smudges and smears. Do they want a wet wipe? No. Do they want to take a bath? Nope. Do they want a snack? You betcha.
6. Immediately after they brush their teeth
Don’t you hate when you eat or drink something too soon after brushing your teeth and the residual toothpaste combines with whatever you just ingested to leave an awful taste in your mouth? Me too, but kids are clearly immune to that — immediately after teeth-brushing proves one of the most popular times to request some snackage. Understanding this predilection is futile, naturally.
7. Right after they have a snack
When it come to the most illogical moments kids ask for snacks, right after they’ve already eaten one has to be right up at the top of the list. There is no amount of reason or words in any language that will convince your child that it doesn’t make sense to eat snacks concurrently. Thus, here we are.
This post was sponsored by Fruit Shoot®.