There’s heartbreak in store for two of the big stars of MTV’s Teen Mom 2, Kailyn Lowry and Javi Marroquin, on the show’s upcoming season. While Javi prepares for deployment in the U.S. Air Force, Kailyn reveals on camera that she had a miscarriage.
Kailyn and Javi already have two children but, as every mother in Kailyn’s shoes can tell you, having healthy kids at home doesn’t lessen the pain of a miscarriage. No matter how early the loss or how many children a mother already has, her heart invariably aches for the child she never got to meet.
It’s not rare for women to be encouraged to remain quiet about their pregnancies for the first trimester, just in case the pregnancy ends in a miscarriage. While this can be comforting for some couples who don’t want to have to explain their losses to friends and family, it leave others feeling isolated and alone. How can you mourn the loss of a baby no one ever knew existed?
Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg and his wife Priscilla went public with their losses last year. The duo have since welcomed a little girl named Max to their family, but as Mark made clear in his Facebook post, the pain of those previous losses is never forgotten. He said he and Priscilla chose to share their experience to pave the way for others to do the same. “In today’s open and connected world, discussing these issues doesn’t distance us; it brings us together. It creates understanding and tolerance, and it gives us hope,” Zuckerberg wrote.
Zuckerberg isn’t the only one preaching openness. The American Pregnancy Association says not talking about miscarriage prolongs the pain and makes it harder to move on. The APA recommends talking to trusted friends or family members or even a therapist about the grief and loss that come with miscarriage.
Teen Mom 2 (and its predecessor, Teen Mom) may not be winning Emmys, but the shows have introduced a generation of young adults to the realities of becoming a teenage parent. Teen pregnancy rates have fallen in direct response to the show, and it’s not hard to imagine that watching Kailyn and Javi speak openly about their loss will help pave the way for more open and honest discussions about miscarriage and pregnancy loss.
For Kailyn, weathering a military deployment on her own with two young children will be hard enough. When you add in the grief and loss of a miscarriage, our hearts are breaking for the strain this young woman must be feeling right now.
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