In the dark days of winter, where the sun sets early and the kids are going crazy, thank goodness for Twitter. Parents are able to connect with other parents and feel assured when they learn they’re not the only ones going a little cuckoo these days. From tooth fairy oopsies to elevator button fights, here are this week’s funniest parenting tweets.
1. Kids don’t listen
Me quickly losing my patience: Girls! I'm sick and tired of you two not listening to me!
Both kids in unison: What'd you say?
— The Dose of Reality (@TheDoseTweets) January 28, 2016
Motivational quote for the night: "my kids are sleeping."
— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) January 25, 2016
3. Bad TV days
Kids these days have no idea what it was like being home sick with nothing to watch but Donahue and Divorce Court.
— Brenna Jennings (@SuburbanSnaps) January 26, 2016
4. Messy floor
"You're not wearing a diaper, do you have to go pee?"
He poops on the floor.
"It was poop not pee, Dada."
Technically he's right.
— Daddy Files (@DaddyFiles) January 26, 2016
5. Worst. Job. Ever.
Cleaned the high chair liner. Heading to get a tetanus shot.
— No Idea: Daddy Blog (@byclintedwards) January 27, 2016
6. Beautiful sunrise?
I woke everyone up so we can enjoy sunrise as a family. They're crying tears of joy. 💞
— Bunmi Laditan (@HonestToddler) January 23, 2016
7. The elevator fight
Judge: How do you plead on the count of murder in the…
6yo: He pushed the elevator button but it was my turn!
Judge: CASE DISMISSED.
— Amy Flory (@FunnyIsFamily) January 23, 2016
The only school Jake has 4 the rest of week is an exam on Thursday. I hope he doesn't expect me 2 feed him or anything, I've got shit to do!
— AmyOztan (@AmyOztan) January 26, 2016
9. Tooth fairy drama
Thank goodness it's the Tooth Fairy that handles all the tooth/money exchanges *pours glass of wine & forgets all about it*
— Laura Gibson (@TheBratRace) January 24, 2016
10. Laundry 4 dayz
Parenthood is full of possibility.
Maybe I'll climb Everest. Or maybe I'll just stare at this mountain of laundry.
— Walking Outside In Slippers (@WalkingOutside) January 27, 2016