13 Parenting confessions prove we are all in this together

Apr 9, 2015 at 1:15 p.m. ET

I've been known to tell a toddler that Caillou is broken and we probably can't watch it ever again. The brief devastation on the part of the 3-year-old was worth not having to hear that whining voice one more time. All tacky children's clothing miraculously never comes in their sizes, restaurants only serve water (and wine, for me), and sometimes the only snacks we have are cucumbers.

Thanks to Reddit, I know I am not the only one who has done a few questionable things in the name of parenting. There's no judgment coming from me. In fact, I hope to add a few of these ideas to my playbook. Parents have to stick together, and the best way to do that is to laugh and commiserate over the shared experience that is parenting.

Here are some of the best parenting confessions from Reddit:

Secret snacks

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"Sometimes I lock myself in the bathroom to eat a snack because I don't want to share it with my kids."

Take a personal day

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"I lied about a Saturday 12-6 overtime shift, so my daughter went to her grandmothers. I went out to breakfast, went to a mall and looked around, then saw a movie. I picked up my daughter at grandmothers, after eating at Five Guy's first."

The playground is closed

Gif: Giphy/Disney

"I consistently tell my toddler that the "playground needs new batteries" because I don't want to go."

When Mom is away...

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"I let my son watch Sesame Street whenever he wants so that I can get stuff done when my wife isn't home. When she's home there's a very strict rationing of TV time."

Brain candy

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"Last Halloween we told the kids that some of the candy was made from nasty things like brains and snot and that they should put those brands into the "Bad Candy Jar" in the kitchen. Then we ate that candy later."

No nap for you

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"Most of the time I do everything in my power to make sure my son doesn't have a nap so that he goes to bed earlier..."

Goodbye pacifier

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"We've had trouble getting my daughter off the pacifier (the nook, we call it). Well this weekend she went to grandma's and when she got back, asked for her nook. We told her the nook fairy came and took it, and left a small bowl of M&M's instead. Seemed to work, so far at least."

Mooch-proof food

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"I have taken to eating almost uniformly hot/ boring/ spicy/ weird food because it's the only thing the kids won't mooch."

Chocolate allergies

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"My daughter believes shes allergic to too much chocolate and the ice cream vans siren means hes sold out of ice cream I feel no shame in having told her this."

You can't find me

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"I play hide and seek with my toddler, and really enjoy the five minutes of peace and quiet I get if I have a good hiding spot. Eventually he finds Mom, who then helps..."

TV time

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"I set up the TV so that he can easily flick on a favorite movie or tv show when he wakes up so that I can get a little bit extra sleep on the weekends. He's been doing this since just before he was 2."

Beware of the sharp bone

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"I tell my 3 year old that there is a really sharp bone in is nose that will cut his finger off if he tries to pick his boogers."

Free day

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"I take my kids to daycare on my days off."

Can you relate to these parents? What's your best parental confession?

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