On an innocent search for Easter baskets for my toddlers this year, I stumbled upon sheer madness. I’m talking about what is known affectionately on the internet as the “Easter haul,” aka a candy overdose unlike anything you’ve seen before.
Giving your kid a kind-of-large Easter basket is not what I’m referring to. Perhaps as a backlash to the strict religious observation of Easter (which I am all too familiar with, growing up in a fundamental Christian home), parents are taking a hard turn in the opposite direction. They are buying carts full of Easter crap presents — enough to make Santa look like a stingy bastard.
Let’s start with exhibit A: In this viral Brooklyn and Bailey Easter Basket Haul video from 2014, you are going to see a lot of things — namely, shorts, necklaces, snacks, bubble bath, candles, candy and so much more.
Exhibit B: In her “What I Got for Easter 2014” video, cutesy teen Taylor opens her massive Easter haul on camera. She scored candy eggs, jewelry, Easter bunny stacking dolls and a fancy squirrel pen with the price tag left on, amongst other treats. Go, Taylor.
Exhibit C: In Megan’s “Easter Haul 2014,” we watch with bated breath as she unwraps chocolate bunnies, flip-flops, goldfish, candy, candy and more candy.
Exhibit D: In another Megan’s “Easter Haul 2013,” we see this mini Taylor Swift unwrap enough candy to kill a 3-year-old child.
I rest my case. I think it is wonderful to plan a special holiday celebration for your child, complete with an Easter basket. I was extra excited to pick out Ninja Turtles and Spider-Man Easter baskets for both my sons and to plan an Easter egg hunt.
Image: Easter Basket/Kendra Raines
What is hard to swallow is that Easter is going the way of Christmas (which still happens to be my all-time favorite holiday). Parents are buying way more gifts than necessary. Kids are expecting an enormous Easter basket they can brag about to all their friends. Every Easter has to be better than the last — not even the delicious, sugary blood of Peeps can satisfy!
For most families, Easter is a time of togetherness and often a religious holiday, depending on your beliefs. While I’m normally the last person to cry “commercialism” (seeing as I love the atrocity that is Valentine’s Day), someone has to say it. If you buy your child 12 dozen chocolate eggs to fill up a kiddie pool or a $400 pair of sunglasses, you’ve gone too far. Jesus and the Easter Bunny do not approve.