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Teens truly are terrible around the holidays

Enjoy your Christmas season when your kids are young, because their enthusiasm for the spirit of the holidays truly does wane when they get older, and things do get a lot less fun.

I’m not saying “bah-humbug” horrible, but it’s definitely not all jingly bells and snowflakes all the time.

Now that I have three teenagers, here are some things my kids are no longer into during the holidays:

The Christmas tree: Oh yes, the idea is still there. They said, “Let’s decorate the tree!” We pulled it out and set it up. And it sat in the living room, bare as could be for over a week, until I finally could take it no more and began to decorate it alone. At first I was quite annoyed. Until I realized I could place each decoration exactly where I wanted it to go. And I was able to decorate the tree in peace and quiet!

Christmas movies, music and television specials: My kids want nothing to do with any of it. When they were little, they were all into Frosty the Snowman, Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer, Santa Claus Is Comin’ to Town and The Grinch. Now, it’s a miracle if we can get the five of us in the same room for three minutes at a time together. I might be able to corral them in front of the TV if I bribe them with a viewing of Will Ferrell in Elf.

Gifts: Oh, the gift-buying just gets worse and worse as they get older. They want and need nothing. Unless it’s an Apple product that costs $300 or more.

No more Santa threats: I can’t even use this on them anymore. It was such a great child-tamer for years and years. “You better stop that! Santa’s watching!” Or, “Don’t bother your sister, or you’ll get on the Naughty List.” Now they can do whatever they want, and there will be no Santa repercussions. He’s still coming, and he’ll probably still bring that damn iPhone upgrade.

While it’s a bummer that my kids don’t appreciate some of the magic of Christmas they used to when they were younger, there are a couple of things that are great about having teens during Christmas:

Sleeping in: No one is tapping your shoulder at 4 a.m. asking, “Did Santa come yet? Can we get up?”

Elf on a Shelf: My kids are old enough that we missed that damn Elf craze, thank you. Hallelujah heaven above that I never had to sneak around for however many nights in a row and tell my kids there was a magical elf watching them every night.

Because that little holiday tradition? That’s just “elfed” up!

More on holidays

Holiday entertaining survival guide
4 Ways to truly enjoy the holidays
Confessions of a Santa: 10 Crazy things kids have asked for

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