We all assume our parents accept us the way we are, so why filter? Not all things said are equal, and many you really should just keep to yourself.
OK, so we all have parents or parent-like figures in our lives, but no one ever taught us how to behave around them. Parents have parenting books, but what about kids? Before you open your mouth and have a mistake tumble out of it, take a moment and think. No matter your age, you should probably steer clear of these phrases.
“You should learn how to take care of yourself first”
Now, to begin with, never tell a parent what to do. Do not lecture them either. Your parents will always try to take care of you, and they will give you advice. OK, sometimes they will force-feed you that advice or harass you with suggestions, but they mean well. Be patient. Don’t retaliate with rudeness. Suck it up, buttercup. You might even become a better person — le shock!
“Better to be over the hill than under it”
Even as a joke, no. Off limits. Do not hint at a parent’s inevitable demise — ever. And don’t poke fun at their age. It’s such a low blow. How can parents retaliate against such a horrible truth? They’re not even allowed to whip out the trusty ol’ belt anymore. Respect your elders, and put a lid on it.
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“Don’t tell me what to do”
Classic. Surprisingly, this line is used by many an adult; it’s not just for teenagers. Through the ages, parents have assumed the role of omnipotence and often consider their opinion to be the proper one. They will force that opinion on you, your friends, your friends’ friends and so on. Do not ever say “don’t tell me what to do.” Firstly, you lose the grip of the helm, and the argument is forfeit, since you just lost control of your emotions. Secondly, a parent will never listen anyway. Just take it, and carry on.
“I can see where (insert daughter’s name) got her body from”
This is mostly a shout-out to the fellas out there. Unless the mother prompts you by asking, “Do you see where (insert daughter’s name) got her body from?” that phrase should have no currency in a conversation with a parent. It insinuates a whole whack of sexual weirdness between you and the daughter in question as well as between you and the mother. Ladies, it is not appropriate to say this to a father figure either.
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“You didn’t love me as a child”
Yes, he or she did. You’re being dramatic. Unless you grew up in a cave in the wilderness and your parents would take turns clocking you in the jaw every day and then put out cigarettes on your fingertips, chances are good your parents loved you. This comment is menacing and implies your parents didn’t raise you adequately or have failed you. It also insults their very being as guardians. Although it’s great for some family drama and an in-depth look into family history, if that’s what you’re into.