If you’ve been casually seeing (OK, hooking up with) someone you see some dating potential with, there are easy ways to try to turn your trysts into something more stable.
It doesn’t always work out, but if you try some of our strategies, you might end up turning your booty call into more than just a late night romp.
Go on an actual date
Getting together at two in the morning is not a date. If you want to see if you can turn your hook-up into something more, you need to go out together, in public. Find a space that’s conducive to conversation, relaxed and somewhere you feel comfortable. In order for the romance to last, you need to click on more than just a physical level. Chill at a cafe, have drinks at a pub, but choose a location where you can talk. You’ll quickly find out if you have anything in common or whether you can be more than just two people who sleep together sometimes.
Try a sleepover
If your off and on hook-up situation has been going on for a while, why not get really bold and see if he wants to (gasp) sleep over and then spend the day together. If you can make it through an entire afternoon, minus too many awkward silences, that could mean there’s something more than sex there. Hook-ups usually mean leaving first thing in the morning (or even in the middle of the night), so this should show you if there’s any potential for something a little more stable.
Tell him how you feel
This one may seem scary, but often people don’t share this one piece of crucial information with their casual hook-up. He may not reciprocate your feelings, but sometimes you just need to take a risk. Tell him you’re hoping to see more of him and find out if he feels the same way. See if there’s anything going on in your area (concert, festival) and ask him if he wants to go. No pressure, just something besides sharing a bed on weekends. Sure, it’s a bold move with potential for rejection, but if you don’t ask, you don’t get!
Introduce him to your friends
Introducing your (maybe) new guy to your close friends is a great way to see if you might be able to move your hook-up into dating territory. Do your girls approve? Gather them up, go someplace casual and invite the guy in question. It’s a great sign if he’s comfortable with your friends and they have a good time with him. It could mean that your hook-up days will soon turn into date nights.