5 No-brainer flirting tips that work

Nov 10, 2011 at 12:00 p.m. ET

There are so many varied flirting techniques and no-fail plans for getting a guy interested that it can be hard to know where to start. But sometimes the best path to take is the simplest one. With that in mind, the dating divas at SheKnows have pulled together five of the most basic flirting tips. They may be dead simple, but they work, and we urge you to ditch the complicated systems and embrace the easy way this time.

Couple flirting at coffee shop

Get closer

Not so close that you seem like a stalker or worse, a close-talker, but just close enough that the guy you're interested in knows that he's on your radar. If he's on the other side of the room or bar, take a walk in his direction. If he's sitting alone, make a point of joining him. The closer you get to someone (within reason), the easier it is to see if there's chemistry and create a positive, flirty energy between you.

Smile more

No guy is ever going to think you like him or even want to spend much time with you if you're not smiling. A smile makes you seem approachable, relaxed and like you're having a good time – the three most important factors when it comes to meeting men. You don't need to grin maniacally all evening (that will have the opposite effect), but let your natural, easy smile shine through.


Giggling like a school girl or howling like a hyena are flirting no-no's but having an open, natural laugh and not being afraid to use it will win you points with whatever guy you like. Being able to laugh – with him, at him and at yourself – shows you have a sense of humor, which is a trait most guys gravitate towards. Plus laughing at his jokes will make him feel good, and the better he feels in your presence, the better your chances are at keeping his attention all night.


No inappropriate touching or groping (at least not yet), but do lean in and brush up against his shoulder, put your hand on his back or touch his arm as you tell him a witty anecdote. Touching sends the message that you are into him and it's a signal he won't be able to ignore. Subtle touching will make him feel like he's the only guy in the room, a feeling he will want to hang onto – not to mention the instant sparks that can be created through touch, that also hold the promise of something more happening later on.

Make eye contact

You can't make a solid connection with someone if you aren't looking them in the eye. This one might seem super obvious, but when you're nervous (and some people are when they flirt), there is a tendency to look down, across the room and at everything but the person you're with. Do your best to meet his gaze – and hold it. A sexy, smoldering look can be all you need to do to catch his attention and it often speaks much louder than words.

Watch: How NOT to flirt

Dating and body language expert Katia Loisel-Furey, co-author of How to Get the Man You Want, reveals the top flirting mistakes that women make.

More dating tips and advice

How to tell if your hookup is turning into the real thing
5 Tips for making your next date better
5 Traits that make up the ultimate catch