How to flirt like a pro

Oct 12, 2010 at 10:47 a.m. ET

No, we don't mean batting your eyelashes (though that can look cute if done well). We're talking the type of subtle flirting that leaves a guy wanting more and hanging off your every word. To help you get started we've gathered five great tips for attracting male attention no matter where you are.

Woman flirting with man in bar

1Be yourself.

This is probably the most important one to keep in mind and the hardest to pull off. Sometimes, when we flirt, some other, super-girly part of us takes over and a giggling, eyelash batting persona emerges. Don't let this happen. If there's a spark, it should be because you're showing off your sparking personality, not massaging his ego. Talk confidently about yourself and what you do, and if he's interested, he'll let you know.

2Maintain eye contact.

One of the worst things you can do when flirting is to look down constantly, making only fleeting eye contact; some people think this is sexy, but it just looks awkward. Worse yet is looking at other guys while talking to him.

3Don't give too much away.

Yes, we know we said "be yourself," but that doesn't mean telling the cute guy who just bought you a drink about your recent stomach flu (ick), your last one-night stand or how bitter you are at men who don't call back. Be yourself, yes, but keep it light and conversational, rather than veering into TMI (too much info) territory.

4Don't be overly touchy.

Being all over someone at a bar may seem sexy, but this is not an advisable flirting technique. It comes across as tacky and desperate, two labels no woman wants. Instead of practically sitting on his lap, keep touching to a minimum. If he says something funny, lean in and touch his knee or shoulder, but only briefly. Subtlety is always more sophisticated.

5Ask questions.

Though showing him your fabulous wit and charming personality is important, listening and asking questions are, too. People love to talk about themselves, given the opportunity; use that to your advantage. This gives you the opportunity to laugh (subtly) at his jokes and seem interested in what he does, but don't let him overtake the conversation. Keep things as even as possible to ensure you get talk time, too.

Happy flirting!

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