Relationships and dating often feels like gaming. Subconsciously (or maybe consciously), you and the person you’re dating end up tossing plays back and forth – it’s like you’re competing for something. But come to think of it, what are you fighting for? Many have theorized why daters play games. With potential reasons ranging from defense mechanisms to insecurities, we rounded up these games. What are the rules? How do you determine a winner? Read on…
The Jealousy Jinx
The Rules: The rules to this one are simple. Boy meets girl, girl likes boy, girl sends herself flowers and pretends like other boys want her to make boy jealous. Why would she do this, you ask? Because in her mind, the boy would like her more if she has the potential to all of a sudden become unavailable. She’ll show the man in question that she’s a commodity – one has to fight for her time.
Who wins: Sadly, this game usually does happen to work. By nature, men are hunters. The jealousy game that the girl is playing will make the boy want to compete with all of her other viable suitors. The girl will win if the boy bites and doesn’t see through her game-playing.
The Rules: This happens when trust is an issue. Both girls and boys, who are either insecure about themselves or their relationships, will play this game. It’s when one party constantly checks his or her significant other’s phone calls, e-mails, text messages, etc. Because of the lack of trust, all modes of contact with the outside world (and potential people to cheat on them with) is checked on a routinely basis.
Who wins: No one wins in this scenario. Without trust, you have nothing. If you have to play the detective game and check your significant other’s stuff, you probably shouldn’t be with that person in the first place.
Space Exploration (a.k.a. “The Break”)
The Rules: “I need space,” one will say. What the other person doesn’t know, however, is that he or she who needs “space” merely wants to date other people, yet doesn’t want to let you go because he or she may be afraid they’ll regret their decision and by the time that is realized, it’ll be too late. So instead, they keep the other person around – you know – just in case the “space” plan (a.k.a. meeting new people) backfires.
Who wins: If you agree to this, the person calling the break wins. Not only does he or she get you to stick around (and for no reason at all, I might add), but he or she will have the opportunity to have some fun on the side (and clearly you won’t be benefiting). At the end of the day, you’re being used as a backup and not receiving what you are giving.