Living "libido" loca

Sep 28, 2007 at 9:29 p.m. ET

She's in the mood and he's not. Then he's in the mood and she's not. It's a familiar downward spiral for many couples that causes feelings of rejection and pain. Often when this happens, resentment builds, leading to even less sex. Soon, even the topic of sex can become taboo.

What can we do to prevent this and synchronize our libidos?
It requires constant effort and commitment to each other to keep the passion going strong. An active imagination and a creative mind are very useful tools for keeping your romantic life spontaneous and fun. Below are some simple strategies that will help you seduce your partner, recover long lost lust and get you both in the mood simultaneously.

Follow theses lucky seven tips and rest assured, you will "get lucky":


The importance of communication cannot be stressed enough. It's the first step in the solution to virtually all relationship problems. We are not mind readers and cannot expect our partners to be either. They cannot possibly know what we want or need without us telling them and vice versa. It sounds simple, and indeed it is, as well as extremely effective.


Countless studies have found a direct correlation between exercise and sexual prowess. The increased blood flow and endorphins released in the mind can boost your libidos. Plus, it's easier to stay motivated when you exercise together.

Eat sensual foods

Prepare romantic meals that include sensual foods and aphrodisiacs. Most well known aphrodisiacs also happen to be healthy, which make sense, since healthier people have healthier sex drives. A candle light dinner of salmon in a light dijon sauce with spinach on the side is the perfect combination of mood foods. The Omega-3 fatty acids in salmon are powerful antioxidants, which aid in raising serotonin levels in the brain, lifting moods and lowering irritability. The dijon sauce will further add to your pleasure since mustard is believed to boost libido in addition to boosting metabolism. The spinach is very healthy for you and researchers have found that it makes you look younger as well. Finally top it off with a dessert of berries and hand feed one another while dipping them in low fat whipped cream. Sexy, and healthy!

Spend time together

Yes, you are both busy, but one on one time is important to maintain on a regular basis to keep your relationship intimate and strong. Commit to setting that time aside every night. If your only "down time" is a half hour of TV at the end of the day, at least watch it together. You may each have programs you like, but compromise is important. If you have to, read a book while snuggling in his arms as he watches his favorite show. Romantic or sexy movies are options as well.

Dress the part

We all know that looking good leads to feeling good and this is the case in the sexual sense as well. Make the effort to stay well groomed, smell fresh, and wear flattering clothing that feels nice whatever activity you are involved in. Feeling desirable will also make you feel desire, and make you more attractive to your partner as well.

Seduction dates

Sex dates can sound like too much pressure. Instead, make SEDUCTION dates. Mark at least two nights for seduction dates during the week so each of you can have a turn at playing the seducer and the seduced. Play music, give a sensual massage, whisper dirty secrets, pamper, and indulge your mate to their heart's desire. The more relaxed they are, the more likely they will be to feel their passion for you. Spend time making out and caressing like a high schooler and you may spark those old school flames of passion.

Erogenous zones

These are the "special spots" on the body that cause arousal when touched or stimulated the right way. These vary by individual, so it's up to you discover what works on your mate. A few ideas of where to start: neck, lips, ears, wrists, shoulders, feet, and most importantly, the mind. The exploring should be fun for both parties, so take your time and enjoy!



More ways to jump start your sex life