Marriage Builder - Completing the Communication Cycle
How can I tell if what I heard is what you said? Good communication is at the core of any healthy relationship and here are three steps to ensure you're understanding each other.
Disruptive misunderstandings Words mean many different things. Sometimes our messages get muddled. We mean to convey one message, but our mate hears something completely different. This can lead to all kinds of misunderstandings, and misunderstandings disrupt family unity. What can you do to insure that what I hear is what you said?
Here's one method to make sure the other person is hearing what is really said and meant. Check it out by repeating what you heard and understood your mate to say. You're not saying you agree; you're simply asking if you're getting the message straight. Then your mate can confirm that you heard correctly. If not, your mate can try to get the message across again.
- First, one person makes a statement.
- Second, the other person gives feedback. "This is what I hear you saying. Is that what you meant?"
- Third, the first person confirms or corrects the message. Keep talking until you both agree that what is being said is the same message that is being heard. Remember, a rewarding part of marriage and family life is being understood! Now, tell us what we said!