Yes, Straight Women Visit Sex Workers — Here's Why

Mar 16, 2018 at 3:00 p.m. ET
Image: Tory Rust/Design: Ashley Britton/SheKnows

Sex is a vital part of health and wellness, yet it is often the least discussed of our health needs, even among women, who are often better than men at staying on top of their well-being. Quality sexual encounters that are mutually pleasurable for all parties involved are often the missing key when it comes to our sex lives.

As fantastic as that sounds, how does one have a quality encounter? What does that experience even look like? The reality is most of us have no idea how to actually have good sex. Instead, most Americans simply turn off the lights, get naked under the covers and hope their partner isn't totally miserable. This is the unfortunate byproduct of a society severely lacking in sex education. This is where sex workers like myself come in — we are the sex educators women need.

More: A Legal Sex Worker on What It's Really Like to Work in a Brothel

So, just what can a sex worker teach the average American female about sex? Quite a lot, in fact. To scratch the surface, there's the practical side of sex education: Which products actually work, which lubes are safe to use with condoms, how you should clean your sex toys and how to tell if an item is a good-quality sex toy in the first place.

Even more important, I can show you which types of ingredients and additives should be avoided in the bedroom. No one is born knowing these things — and we sure aren't getting this education in school. Sex workers are real sexperts, and with that comes valuable knowledge that can help shape your sexual experiences as an individual.

Seeing a sex worker is a unique opportunity to fill the missing gaps in your education and learn about the things you have always been curious about. Many women don’t have a proper education on how to use protection in the bedroom — especially what kind of protection should be used between two women in an encounter. Not knowing these important points can make sex with other women or even bringing another woman into the bedroom for your partner a risky endeavor.

More: This Is Why I Decided to Become a Sex Worker

Curious how to give your partner a unique experience they’ll never forget? Want to learn positions and add techniques to your repertoire? Sex workers have devoted themselves to giving incredible experiences to their visitors and can help give you that edge in the bedroom that will leave your partner out of breath and stunned at your prowess. Want to learn how to give a nuru massage? Interested in how to give oral sex that will leave your partner dizzy with pleasure? These techniques and more are easy to learn from a professional sex worker therapy session.

Dig deeper, and on the next level you'll find the personal side of sex education: Know thyself. When’s the last time you took some real time, explored yourself and gave yourself a toe-curling orgasm? For most of us, the answer is "it's been a while." Personal sex ed classes help to put you back in touch with your body and discover erogenous zones you never knew existed.

Until you've dedicated the time to exploring your body with the guidance of a professional, you'll likely be missing out on an entire level of enjoyment and pleasure. Knowing your precise pleasure preferences will make it so much easier to have quality sex encounters with your current or future partners. Intimately knowing your body is a life skill that will pay dividends throughout your entire sexual life. The skills you hone with a sex worker will continue to benefit you throughout your lifetime.

Married, single, engaged or "it's complicated" — no matter your relationship status, there is so much to be gained from getting a great sexual education. There is so much power and wisdom that comes from women learning from each other and sharing meaningful life skills. It’s not just about the sex — it's about you. How can you best pursue your relationship goals? How can you invest in and develop yourself? And how can you have a better sex life?

This is about making time for you despite your career, your family and your busy schedule. It's reclaiming your sexuality in the most powerful way possible — through education.

Alice Little is a courtesan at the Moonlite Bunny Ranch.

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