I started watching the reality show Married at First Sight because I thought the concept of marrying a complete stranger was outrageous. After watching a few episodes, I realized these daring couples were facing the same obstacles many of us face after they walk down the aisle. Particular to this season, there are trust issues, abandonment issues, insecurities and enough egos to fill an ocean.
Fortunately, the participants have access to a team of experts to help them navigate their challenges. Shhh… don’t tell anyone, but I’ve been secretly using the experts as my own personal coaching team. Yep, I take their advice and strategies and apply them to my marriage of two and a half years. My hubby knows that right after every episode, there will be some kind of discussion about who we are and where we are in our marriage — gotta love a guy who’s willing to indulge my need to “process.”
The Sexy Bowl
The experts introduced a bowl of sexy activities to the couples as a way to jump-start their intimacy engine. My marriage is like part eight of The Fast and Furious and we have enough nitrous oxide to last a lifetime, but I still had fun replicating this activity. Our Sexy Bowl was once used to hold pretzels, but now it holds a ton of naughty notes. My husband always laughs when he reaches his hand in because he never knows what kind of craziness I will propose.
I am a big fan of date nights. I love getting dressed up — or down — and I always look forward to the laughter. Like the experts on the show, I agree that going out provides couples with the opportunity to create memories, and that can help support the relationship during rough patches. From candlelit dinners to football games, nothing says romance like holding hands with my favorite guy and knowing I don’t have a curfew!
Three Things I Like About You
I was shocked when one of the wives on the show was unable to think of three things she liked about her husband. Of course, I had to pause the TV to run into the dining room to engage my husband. To his credit, he took off his glasses and gave me his full attention. To my surprise and without prompting, he told me he liked how creative, driven and thoughtful I am. This activity provided some real perspective on what we appreciate about each other and how those attributes bring value to the relationship.
Married at First Sight has shown me you can be purposeful about ensuring that your marriage remains intimate, fun and satisfying. All relationships are tested, but if you’re willing and open, you can take the reins and truly enjoy the ride.