When some of us think of “sex games,” we mistakenly get images of playing doctor and nurse — which can be thrilling, don’t get me wrong, but has also become a bit of a cliché.
Sex games can be as risqué or tame as you want them to be, but you aren’t doing them justice if you outright dismiss them as cheesy or consider them something couples only do when they’ve lost the spark in their relationship. Plain and simple, they’re fun and can help you get worked up and eventually orgasm — what’s not to love?
If you’re in the market for new sex games to try this year, here are six to get you started:
1. The Countdown
Inspired by the actual New Year’s Eve countdown, Nikki Martinez, a psychologist and licensed clinical professional counselor, suggests the following game: Each person gets five to six options of what they would like to do sexually and then they alternate and agree to try out each and every desire. This is a great way to reveal to your partner all of those secret sex fantasies you’ve been harboring all year, as well as to find out what’s on his mind. “This clearly and easily can go on for hours,” Martinez says. If it helps, write your fantasies down on little slips of paper, put them in a hat, and take time choosing.
2. Web cam afternoon delight
Be warned, this one is extra risqué and you should consider with caution. The world of web cams can be a scary place — best to navigate it as a couple if you dare! You can log onto a website like Chatroulette and pick your pleasure, whether that means watching other couples get intimate, watching women or men masturbate, or even (if you’re feeling especially adventurous) letting others watch you fool around with each other. Modern-day voyeurs never had it so good.
Less risqué alternative: Make a private sexy video (preferably not on a cloud-connected device if you own one).
3. Master and submissive
Fifty Shades of Grey brought the world of BDSM into every “average person’s” household. You can’t be blamed for being curious about S&M, even if you’re unwilling to be chained up or spanked. The lovely thing about having a “master” and “slave” relationship in the bedroom is that you can make it as hardcore or mild as your heart’s desire. Start off by either deciding who will play master and slave (or flip a coin and force yourself out of your comfort zone). What you “force” your partner to do or agree to be “forced” to do should, preferably, be discussed beforehand (you need to know if your partner has zero interest in feeling actual pain). And, of course, decide on a safe word!
4. Set a timer
Here’s a great game for anyone who suspects they’re jumping into intercourse too fast. Set a timer on your phone (10-15 minutes is a good start) and agree that you aren’t allowed to engage in penetration until that beeper goes off. In the interim, you can explore each other’s bodies using your hands, tongues, vibrators or any other object you find interesting. By the time the buzzer goes off, you should both be on fire and ready for the next step.
5. Strip poker
You’re probably thinking: please. I’ve been playing strip poker since college (ahem, or maybe you’re so not thinking that). Not only does the game never go out of style, but if you insist on bringing it up to speed with the tech age, you and your partner can play strip poker online with actual people. Or, maybe, just keep it between you two and update your choice of beverage from cheap beer to scotch?
6. TV temptations
There’s a good chance you and your partner have a favorite TV show (or 12) you’re binge-watching on Netflix or HBO pretty much all of the time. Turn it into an opportunity to have crazy awesome foreplay that can lead to even better sex (but only after your show is over, obviously). Here’s how: Agree beforehand that certain actions taken by your favorite characters (or specific plot outcomes) equals a specific sex act the other person must perform on the spot. For example: Frank Underwood from House of Cards is probably going to backstab someone at some point within 10 minutes of the show’s start — it would be wise to request five minutes of oral sex the moment this happens (just push pause).