What women say vs. what men hear (and what we really mean)

Jan 23, 2015 at 11:30 a.m. ET
Image: Pixabay

Women can be so cryptic, can't they? Well, actually, not to other women usually. But a lot of what they say and do is still a great mystery to guys, who don't always (read: never) speak the same language. We're here to help all you clueless men out there translate what your lady is really trying to tell you. Chances are, it's not what you think.

1. What she says: "Do I look like I've gained weight?"

What he hears: "Is this a trick question?"

Diet GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

What she really means: "I'm feeling self-conscious and need a compliment from you right now."

Clueless Compliment GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

2. What she says: "I'm fine."

What he hears: "I'm fine."

Ross Geller I'm Fine GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

What she really means: "I'm not fine at all, and I want you to figure it out and make me feel better."

Pam The Office Crying GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

3. What she says: "Nothing's wrong."

What he hears: "Nothing's wrong."

The Nanny I'm Cool GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

What she really means: "You hurt my feelings and I want you to apologize."

Christina Applegate Sorry GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

4. What she says: "When you do the dishes, you should do them this way."

What he hears: "You're an idiot and you did it wrong."

Baby Idiot GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

What she really means: "I'm just trying to help."

Peanuts Help GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

5. What she says: "I love you."

What he hears: "I love you and I want to have sex with you."

Jessica Alba Sexy GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

What she really means: "I love you and I'm picturing you as a husband and father right now."

Baby Daddy GIF

GIF credit: Giphy.com

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