Just because you’re a mom doesn’t mean that you aren’t sexual. And that can and does extend into dreamland. What do moms dream about when the lights are out?
1. X-rated snuggling
Recently, I had a dream that I was doing some hardcore snuggling with a famous athlete. There was no sex involved at all, it was just tons of hugging under the covers — even though I was in dreamland, and come on, anything can happen, right? I found it amusing that despite the freedom of dreaming, I hadn’t participated in any pounding. This prompted me to ask some of my mom friends what their sex dreams were like, and I was not disappointed.
2. Disney dungeon
“I had a dream that I was a mermaid,” says one mom. “I saw this super-hot guy on a boat, so I swam close to the boat and he caught me in his fishing net. He then took me to his quarters and sawed my fin in two (while laughing maniacally) and then had sex with my fin that he sawed in two. I seemed to enjoy it in my dream despite the blood and the creepy laughter… but when I woke up I was like, ‘What the hell?!’ I can’t watch The Little Mermaid anymore.”
3. Package problems
Another mom said that her sex dreams are all about anticipation and build-up. “When it comes time to actually do the deed, it’s a micro-penis, or a baguette or something weird,” she shares. “And if it isn’t with my husband I immediately feel guilty.”
4. A-list sex life
Celebrities are common dreamland sex partners. “My dreams mainly involve Jared Leto,” says a mom. Then she showed me this.
5. Whatever I’m binge watching
And other moms have dreams that take a twist they weren’t expecting. “We’ve been binge watching Star Trek: Enterprise, so I’ve had a few sex dreams involving those characters,” a mom of two tells me. “Most were pretty understandable: Captain Archer, Tripp, Hoshi — fairly attractive people. The weirdest one, however, was with Dr. Phlox (the one on the far right). No idea where that came from.”
6. Suddenly slutty
And some moms relive their high school years, but with a different ending. “I had a dream once that I was in high school again and had sex with just about every guy I saw that day,” shares a mom of four. “I woke up laughing because it was ridiculous.”
Bottom line: No bets are off in sex dreams
Dreams allow you to experiment in places where you normally wouldn’t in a million years choose to have sex. “I had a dream that I was in a glass elevator going buck wild with a guy and everyone could see us,” says a mom of three. “But it was so good I couldn’t stop!”
Other moms are continually disappointed in their sex dreams. “Sure, I have sex dreams, and I even manage to have real-life orgasms as a result, but it’s usually because I’m masturbating in my dream,” a mom of three explains. “How completely stupid and boring — I do that anyway!”
Dreams are strange experiences, and anything can and usually does happen. While we may not admit that we’re boinking complete strangers in our dreams, it can be a fun topic for a girls’ night out. What kinds of sex dreams do you have?