5 Dating lessons as evidenced by JLo's love life

Sep 11, 2014 at 9:00 a.m. ET
Image: Jason Merritt/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

Jennifer Lopez recently opened up in the October issue of Elle UK, and the things she has to say about dating are surprisingly relatable. It appears the ups and downs that come with being single don't discriminate — they affect all of us.

1. Mistakes don't make you a relationship outcast

It's easy to confuse celebrity status with perfection, but Lopez was candid about her numerous dating mistakes in the Elle UK interview. "Everybody has seen that I make mistakes. Every single album I have ever made is about love." It takes a big person to admit when you've done something wrong, especially when you've done something to muck up your relationship. If a superstar like Lopez can admit she's less than perfect, then the rest of us probably should too.

2. But you should always learn from them

This may be our favorite JLo dating lesson. After a breakup, Lopez asks herself, "'What did I do? What can I learn?' And as hard and as hurtful as things get, I want to believe I will be able to go one step higher. I've got to hope that if I keep going I will eventually get it right." If we're going to have to admit to making mistakes, we can make ourselves feel better by looking for the opportunity to learn and grow. Don't be content with bumping into the same walls. Adjust, tweak, improve. All that hurt should not be for nothing.

3. Romance can bury warning signs you shouldn't ignore

If there is one lesson all singles should have tattooed on their brain, it's "Don't ignore the signs." But we do. We assume in the early stages that the other person is nervous, maybe overcompensating or trying to impress with the things they say — so we excuse their missteps. How many times have we dated someone for a period of time, only to "discover" something later that we probably knew from the beginning? We ignore the signs because we want to believe in love, in the other person and in our ability to function in a relationship. Jenny admitted, "I rush in, I get swept up, I ignore the signs." Sing it sister. Don't we all?

4. Breakups hurt, but make peace with your exes

Lopez told Katie Couric that she keeps in touch with Ben Affleck and that she was happy for him when his movie Argo won awards. She's also been spending time with recent ex Casper Smart and she has two children with ex-husband Marc Anthony, so she asked herself, "OK, well how do we make this work, how do we make this better, how do we make this great for the children anyway?" Drama is for soap operas and the only people we hurt when we carry around negativity toward others is ourselves. Putting exes and past relationships in their rightful place brings us the peace we need and deserve.

5. Don't ever give up on love, even if it's cheesy

Ah, we love Jenny From The Block's can-do spirit, don't we? She's a dynamo when it comes to her career, and she seems to apply that same determination to her personal life. It's easy to get discouraged, bitter and jaded, but again, who does that hurt? It doesn't hurt the people you're not dating, right? It only means weekends alone yelling at the cat. Take it from Lopez — "The nirvana man, he's out there somewhere. But you just have to work at it. You have to work at everything."

Dating isn't easy for anyone — even the beautiful, famous, rich and talented.

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