Want to know the secrets to making love last? We asked Loving You users to share their secrets to lasting love and guess what — it’s not roses and elaborate romantic schemes.
Loving You users tell us their secrets of success…
These 12 tips are practices and rituals that if followed will help your relationship truly feel like happily ever after.
1. A gesture a day: “When my girlfriend and I got together, I told her not a day would pass without her somehow knowing she’s on my mind and in my heart. So, I leave her short notes, either at work for her to find when she gets there, or via e-mail every morning reminding her how beautiful she is to me, how much I need, want and love her. It always helps her start her day with a smile.” -Southern Gentleman
2. Be yourself: “The best way for a person to be romantic is by being your own self. Don’t let others tell you what to do. Come up with something no one would expect. Like ask your girlfriend or boyfriend to make love under the kitchen table. Do something creative. Show who you are.” -Kurupted Monk
3. Cherish the moment: “Don’t rush lovemaking. Take the time to pay attention to your mate. Not only try to please yourself, but make sure that they are also pleased. During and after, look into each other’s eyes. No words are needed. Just looking in each other’s eyes at such an intimate time is such an overwhelmingly wonderful feeling!” -Anonymous
4. Discover their interests: “Take one night out and find out each other’s needs and rules. These play a big part in relationships. For example — some people are turned on more visually — so presenting a flower says much more than saying, ‘I love you.’ Others like hearing the words more than having something done for them. Still others like to get a feeling – a touch, a hug — most people like a combination of these. Sit and discover each other’s needs. Take about 3 hours with each other. It could be the most wonderful thing you’ll do.” -Anonymous
5. Express how you really feel: “Tell them how you really feel about them, that you love them from the inside not just the outside. Say sweet and loving things like: ‘Your eyes can make the sun rise,’ or ‘Your the reason my heart beats,’ or ‘You look so good, I wish I could grow a whole field of you.'” -Marty Mar
6. Create an after-the-day ritual: “When my boyfriend and I get together the first thing we do is give each other a kiss. We tell each other about our day and share our thoughts about each other. We help each other with any problems we might have, and in the end we are both happy with just being together.” -Candy
7. Send letters of love: “Even if you live close to your loved one, even if you are married to him/her, loving letters show that you love him or her. They show that you are willing to expend time showing that person how much you care. They mean even more, of course, when there is a distance to overcome. Write down your deepest, truest, most intimate feelings — because being vulnerable with your lover shows that you trust him or her and strengthens bonds between the two of you. A suit of armor is not romantic! Be vulnerable, but be sincere.” -Shannon
8. Have love rituals: “It is good to have rituals in your relationship that are unique to you and your love one. For instance, I could order the Sunday paper, but my girlfriend and I have decided that it is a lot more fun to wake up on Sunday morning and enjoy a nice walk down to 7-eleven together. We do this every Sunday and it is so peaceful and relaxing. I gives a chance to talk and laugh. Then we come back and read the sunday funnies and the rest of the paper together.” -Todd
9. Open your heart: “Often the greatest way to show your love is by giving someone your trust. Open up and tell your mate something about you that no one else knows. It’s a sure fire way to let them know how special they are and how much they mean to you.” -Quiana
10. Pay attention: “The best way that I have found to show that you love that person is to pay attention to what they tell you. It’s a very easy thing to do, but it is often overshadowed by personal thoughts or wants.” -Michael
11. Praise your mate: “Tell them that they are the best. Kiss often and comfort each other by holding each other.” -The Gallie
12. Remain playful: “A true token of love, to me, is an ability to share a playful moment together. We as couples usually share work, home life, quiet times and intimate times, but play is the most romantic and connected feeling of all. When I meet that special someone who can fulfill all my desires in a person, my only hope is that we will be able to remain playful throughout our lives!” -Jaxx