Have you ever looked at a fashion trend, furrowed your brows, scrunched up your face and looked around as if to say, “Are you freaking kidding me?” Of course you have. Because outlandish, ugly, unrealistic fashion trends are everywhere. All it takes is one “it-girl” to get her picture taken in some ridiculous get-up and the trend becomes mass produced, marketed and deemed acceptable. We’re here to call foul on the village idiots who are perpetrating these trends.
Neon-colored eye shadow creams
No. Not OK. No one looks good in brilliant turquoise eye cream. Unless you moonlight as a clown or you’re in a Broadway show and have to be seen from the back row, skip this. It’s OK. We know you’re being bombarded with images of girls sporting neon-colored eye creams. It doesn’t make it right. Let’s all take a stand so this trend can “exit stage left.”
Did all designers throw out the first page of What Not to Design for the Female Figure? Horizontal stripes are more commonplace than Lindsey Lohan court appearances. Why isn’t anyone standing up in the middle of the room screaming, “Horizontal stripes make us look fat!” The occasional horizontal stripe across the chest might be acceptable, but when applied to the waist and hips, they are pure evil. Stop the madness.
Super tight ponytails and buns
We’d hate to single out one person for overdoing the super-tight ponytail or bun, but J. Lo, we’re talking to you. Why not just shave your head and get it over with? Let’s be honest here. This is what the rest of us girls in America call “housewife hair.” We do it because we have three day greasy hair and two hours of nasty chores to do. We expect more from celebrities who have stylists and hair and makeup artists. If we feel bad leaving the house in this unflattering hair style, so should celebrities. Let’s not try to church it up and make it something it’s not. Bad celebrity hair is the same as bad non-celebrity hair.
Justin Bieber’s hair
Speaking of bad celebrity hair! Here is a riddle for you. How can you tell when a celebrity is surrounded by yes-men and a** kissers? Answer: When a male celebrity walks out into public rocking a tween-girl haircut. We all love the Biebs, right? On that we can agree. If he were in his 40s, we could understand “his people” trying to make him look younger. But we always believed that someone should give the boy a haircut if he’s ever going to be taken more seriously by people other than 11-year-old girls. So you can only imagine how happy we are to see that he’s finally sporting semi-normal hair. Now if the rest of his generation would only follow suit.
Watch: Style rules
Today on The Daily Dish, Kelly Bensimon, author of I Can Make You Hot, gives you style tips that are sure to make you look your best.
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