14 signs you were raised by a dentist

Oct 5, 2016 at 4:10 p.m. ET
Image: Anton Petukhov/Getty Images

I believe children of dentists have more burdens to bear than children of any other type of doctor, because there's far more daily guilt that goes along with dental care. And what better time to have the relive that guilt than this month, which is National Dental Hygiene Month.

As a child of a dentist, I can assure you, that guilt never goes away, even after your dentist parent is retired. There are simply too many ways you can knowingly (and unknowingly) mess up your teeth. But it's not just about tooth care guilt. Here are 14 signs you were raised by a dentist parent that go way beyond sugar-free soda.

More: 10 signs you have an older sister in your life

1. You have a personal vendetta against flossing

Image: Giphy

You purposefully floss less now that you're an adult as a form of rebellion against all those years of surprise in-home floss inspections. However, the victorious feeling only lasts until your dentist parent sees the state of your gums at your annual checkup.

2. You've had more x-rays taken than all of your friends

Image: Kaleb Fulgham/Flickr

You could easily make a giant, elaborate collage of all the x-ray photos of your molars alone. You also tend to glow a little at night from all the radiation (jk jk, but seriously, that's a lot of radiation exposure).

3. You've used the water jet dental tool as a squirt gun on the hygienists

Image: Giphy

Come on... They were probably having fun too.

4. When people find out your dad/mom's a dentist, they automatically ask you for dental advice

Image: Giphy

Last I checked, a dentistry degree was not genetically transferrable, but sure, you might want to get that greyish tooth checked out.

More: The Brawny man has been replaced (and it’s about time!)

5. ...Or an appointment with your dentist parent

Image: Giphy

Suddenly you're playing the role of busy receptionist. "The doctor is booked all through March, but would sometime in April work for you?"

6. And then of course there's the personal tooth scrutiny

Image: Giphy

People can't understand why you've had cavities filled if you're the child of a dentist.

7. You have a special relationship with Steve Martin in Little Shop of Horrors

Image: Giphy

And your dentist parent LOVES playing into that scary stereotype.

8. The thought of non-sugar-free gum makes your teeth hurt

Image: Giphy

That stuff was never allowed anywhere near your mouth when you were growing up, so now you have an inherent aversion to it.

9. But you still gamble on chewy snacks at the movies, like Starburst, Milk Duds, and gummy worms

Image: Giphy

After all, it feels really good to be bad sometimes.

10. Somehow you always forget your toothbrush when you travel.

Image: Giphy

Because of how many times you get free ones, you always expect them to appear when you need one.

11. You play the "which actor's got veneers" game every time you watch a movie

Image: Giphy

Spoiler alert: all of them.

12. You've probably (definitely) taken a secret hit or two of nitrous when no one was looking

Image: YouTube

What? They give it to patients all the time!

13. You can tell what all your friends' gingivitis levels are just by looking at their smiles

Image: Gif2fly

Uh oh... Sarah's creeping into level two...

14. You've had more retainers made for you than anyone ever should

Image: Giphy

If only they'd stop accidentally getting thrown into the trash!

More: 5 ways being an introvert is nothing like being antisocial

Comments