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Rapid Reads: 7 Big stories of the day

Hit the snooze button one too many times this morning? That’s OK because we’ve got all the morning news you missed. Here are the top stories everyone will be talking about:

1. Shhh

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie created controversy this weekend when he had an animated phone conversation in an Amtrak quiet car. Christie was leaving D.C. on the 9:55 a.m. train, when other passengers report he began yelling into his phone. Gawker initially said Christie was confronted and kicked out of the car. According to a witness on Twitter, Christie didn’t know he was in the quiet car until a conductor came around, but left immediately once he realized his mistake. Either way, he’s issued an apology for repeatedly yelling, “Are you frickin’ kidding me,” into his phone in the quietest spot on the train. — TIME

More: Jimmy Fallon and Chris Christie are dancing dads (VIDEO)

2. Too much of a bad thing

Over the weekend, President Obama said what a lot of parents have been dying to hear: He called for less standardized testing in schools. He acknowledged his administration’s own role in the push for testing, and set forth a new proposal that students should spend no more than two percent of class time filling out answer sheets. He says the need for change became evident after he spoke to far too many students, teachers and parents who are overly stressed. Now, we’ll have to see if Congress will actually do anything to fix it. — The New York Times

3. So heartbreaking

On Saturday, a 25-year-old woman drove a car into the crowd at an Oklahoma State University homecoming parade. Four people were killed, including a toddler, and nearly 50 were injured. The driver, Adacia Chambers, was arrested on charges of driving under the influence, but now her attorney is saying he thinks she was actually “mentally unstable.” Police have yet to release any evidence to the public, but it will likely take a while to get to the bottom of why this happened. — USA Today

More: Transgender homecoming queen makes history

4. Dodged a bullet

Hurricane Patricia made landfall this weekend and… that was pretty much it. The storm was the strongest ever measured, but as soon as it hit land, it took a detour into the mountains and quickly dissipated. Much of Mexico was spared severe damage, though parts of the country are damaged and experiencing floods. No deaths have been reported so far, and the Gulf Coast of the U.S. is preparing for heavy rains. — CNN

5. Flop

Jem and the Holograms opened in theaters this weekend, and no one really cared. It had the worst debut for a studio movie ever, pulling in only $1.32 million and getting slammed by critics. The directors decided to forego the original show’s sci-fi elements and focus instead on just being famous tweens in the internet age. The move proved fatal, as it drove away nostalgic adult fans of the show while failing to attract teens who were unfamiliar with who Jem and the Holograms even are. This is what happens when you mess with perfection. — BuzzFeed

More: Jem and the Holograms sends uncomfortable messages to little girls

6. Yikes

Ben Carson freaked everyone out this weekend when he said he’d “love to see Roe v. Wade overturned” and compared abortion to slavery. Carson wants abortion to be legal even in cases of rape or incest and says women who abort babies are like “slave owners” who think they have the right to do whatever they want to a slave. He also said he’d consider changing his stance on abortion in cases where the mother’s health is in danger, but those circumstances are “extremely rare.” Why is anyone still listening to this guy? — Refinery29

7. Haunting

Construction workers in Texas were digging in a yard on Elm Street when they unexpectedly unearthed a coffin. The four-foot long box contained bags of bones and keepsakes they thought belonged to a child, until a neighbor told them it was actually dog bones and photos of a family pet that had been buried for 30 years. Workers are calling it their “nightmare on Elm Street.” Sure, why not? It’s the last week before Halloween, so we’ve got to get all the spooking out of our systems. — Complex

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