24 Most annoying things you can say to couples without kids

Oh, we know you smug parents are just making harmless small talk, but when did chatting about fertility issues or lack of maternal instincts become up for discussion at parties, in supermarkets or while you are getting your hair done?

It starts with “so when are you two going to get married?” As soon as you’re married or over 25, people want to know when you are going to start having kids. Even if you have one kid, they want to know when you are having the next one.

For childless couples by choice or by circumstance, if we had a dollar for every single time smug parents made thoughtless comments about being kid-free, we could end world hunger. The blunt truth is, it’s not really any of your business. While we may not mind occasionally discussing the topic with close friends, random strangers, listen up — it’s annoying. So, next time you’re making small talk, here is a comprehensive list of things you shouldn’t say to couples without kids.

1. You are not a real family until you have kids.

2. Tired? You don’t know the meaning of tired until you have kids.

3. Who is going to look after you in your old age?

4. You’re so lucky, we can’t afford to go on a proper vacation with three kids.

5. We didn’t invite you to the party because we know you don’t like kids.

6. We only invited our friends who have kids.

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7. I feel sorry for you not having kids.

8. You’re not getting any younger.

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9. Why don’t you want kids?

10. How can you deprive your husband of the joy of having children?

11. So you’re replacing kids with animals instead?

https://twitter.com/BraveIntrovert/statuses/414065363467632640

12. Don’t you want more meaning out of life?

13. What if everyone else had your attitude to having children?

https://twitter.com/RealStuart/statuses/369991142126809089

14. There are some things only a mother understands.

15. Material things don’t matter when you have kids.

https://twitter.com/Antinatalism/statuses/469911229927280641

16. You will get pregnant as soon as you relax and just forget about trying.

17. It must be lovely to do what you want whenever you want.

18. You’ll regret not having children when you are older.

19. It must be so lonely not having kids.

20. Only selfish people don’t want to have children.

21. You’re not a real woman until you’ve given birth naturally without drugs.

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22. You don’t realise what it is to love until you’ve had a child.

23. What is wrong with you?

24. You don’t know the meaning of hard work until you’ve had kids.

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