It takes two to tango in any relationship and that means balance, communication and a strong foundation. But if we can’t love ourselves first, how can we expect to be able to take on the ultimate dance of love and invest fully into our relationships? Here’s how we can boost our relationships by learning to love ourselves first.
It’s easy to become overwhelmed by relationships and be more concerned about the needs of the people around us rather than our own. But by loving ourselves and investing time into our own needs and desires, we are not only respecting and loving ourselves, but we’re also creating a loving environment for the people in our lives too.
Like attracts like
By making a conscious effort to put ourselves first, to respect ourselves and to treat ourselves with love and kindness, we are putting energy out into the world of what we want to attract. Like attracts like, after all, so if we respect and honour ourselves we are going to attract relationships in our lives which are respectful and honourable as well. If we don’t treat ourselves with love and respect then we won’t receive love and respect.
Put it into practice: Show respect and love for yourself by getting enough sleep, by treating yourself to something special when you can and by managing your time efficiently to avoid stressful situations. Listen to yourself and what you want.
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Know your value
Respect means honouring how we feel and what we want. A good way to really confront what we think about ourselves and our own value is to write it all down. Take a moment to write down your achievements, your goals and your greatest qualities, then give yourself a pat on the back and really acknowledge all your great achievements. When we respect ourselves, we are ultimately showing the world that we are worthy and lovable.
Put it into practice: Reward yourself when you have done well at completing a task, or when you’ve accomplished a goal. Set goals regularly and work to achieve them. Also, take note of your great qualities and celebrate them. Celebrate with a dinner or by treating yourself to something special.
Loving yourself and putting yourself first can be something as simple as taking care of your health. Giving yourself time to exercise and taking the time to prepare healthy meals will put you in an open and loving space, which will not only benefit how you feel but will also benefit how the people around you feel, which will impact your relationships.
Put it into practice: Set time aside to exercise and spend time taking care of your health and fitness. Go to the gym or take a yoga class and make this time about you.
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In any relationship, it’s important to have your own time set aside to do what you love, to relax and to be pampered. This gives you a chance to explore your creativity, activities you love and other accomplishments which make you feel energised and invigorated.
Put it into practice: It could be as easy as taking time out to enjoy your favourite cup of coffee in the morning, or it could mean a day of pampering just for you. Remember to love and respect yourself by setting time aside for yourself — guilt-free, of course!
Take life by the reins and feel like the powerful person you are. Feeling powerful in mind and body will make you a strong communicator and help put you in a better frame of mind that invites happiness and support.
Put it into practice: Why not begin repeating positive affirmations to yourself, or start doing boxing classes or exercising with weights? When you feel strong in body, you feel strong in mind, too.
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We all have some baggage that seems to be lingering, don’t we? Well, this baggage could be holding us back in our relationships and it is time to let it go. Acknowledge and learn from the past, but recognise what serves you and what doesn’t and let go of the things that don’t.
Put it into practice: Forgive. Forgive yourself, forgive people who have hurt you and stop letting it affect your present, your future and, of course, your relationships. Love yourself by giving yourself permission to forgive and let go. It will feel great.
Loving yourself is just as important as the love and respect we invest in the people around us, but it is something we often forget to do. When we acknowledge and love ourselves first, we open our lives to positive people, situations and environments as well as relationships which support us and help us flourish.