Holiday parties can be full of merriment with your family, friends and co-workers but sometimes they can also be full of, well, humiliation.
Whether it’s an intimate family gathering or a crowded office party, something about holiday celebrations can bring out the worst in people. “It’s the crazy, rude, ignorant conversation topics that make it a family Christmas dinner. You have a full year to prepare witty comebacks and passive-aggressive self defense jabs,” says Liz V. “If you want polite conversation then just invite your friends.”
So in the spirit of the season we’ve rounded up the best of the worst comments said over a holiday table. You’ll laugh, you’ll cringe, you’ll roll your eyes but no matter what, you won’t feel alone the next time your uncle asks you if you’re pregnant or just fat.
“A relative said, ‘Your miscarriage was part of God’s plan. If he wants you to have a baby, the right baby will be born to you.’ I think she was trying to make me feel better? She really, really didn’t.” — Angela S.
“I have a family member with Crohn’s disease who loves to openly discuss his bowel habits (including showing his colostomy bag!) while eating holiday meals.” — Michelle K.
“At our office gift exchange, my co-worker congratulated me in front of everyone… for getting an abortion. Then she added, ‘You wouldn’t have made a good mother anyways.'” — Anonymous
“I once had a conversation that started with, ‘So here’s what I learned about your ex-boyfriend by going through the State Court Records.'” That’s not a great Christmas present, FYI. — Eleanor C.
“My grandma came straight out and asked me, ‘I heard you got divorced. What did you do wrong?’ That stopped the caroling right in its tracks.” — Louisa P.
“My friend, who’s a doctor and had been a med student at the time, looked at the fancy dinner spread and said ‘This brisket looks like the cadaver we dissected today!'” — Alyssa Z.
“My parents love to complain about how badly behaved my kids are… after they’ve spent all morning sugaring them up, without my permission!” — Lyndsey L.
“My least favorite holiday comment was when someone asked me, ‘Why aren’t you pregnant yet?’ To which I responded, ‘Why has nobody smacked you yet?'” — Charlotte N.
“My mother-in-law asked all of the parents at the table to come up with one word to describe their child. Everyone had really sweet things to say until it was my mom’s turn. ‘Conniving’ was her word choice. Not creative, loving, funny, no. Conniving!” — Anna R.
“Someone at a holiday party once told me how sorry they were that my parents named me Daryl and that I wasn’t a male. She said that life must have been difficult for my parents and even more difficult for me growing up. I told her that I both love my name and my parents who named me! She looked at me like I was the crazy one.” — Daryl O.
“At a family holiday party our whole extended family learned my younger cousin isn’t circumcised. The real kicker is that my aunt shared this about her adult son when he wasn’t even there!” — Julie C.
“I used to think that the worst holiday conversation topic was politics — until my family became food critics. Now all we talk about is fat content, carbs and calories in every single thing we eat. And GMO this, gluten-free that, and who’s vegan and… I don’t care anymore! Just eat!” — Deb B.
“Family planning should be off the table. Take this recent comment at a recent family get-together: ‘Your son is 1 now, when is baby number two coming? Are you guys working on that?'” — Ashley U.
“It sounded innocent enough — one sibling asking another if they’d vaccinated their kids yet — but it ended with tears, a broken plate and one family leaving for a hotel before dessert was served.” — Jackie S.
“I hate it when people talk about my weight. At a recent party a friend told me, ‘You plump up when you’re happy!’ Well I’m not happy! I do not want to remain this way or have others make excuses for it. Just don’t talk about weight.” — Angela W.
“After the recent death (self-inflicted) of a loved one, a cousin decided that Christmas Eve was the best time to tell us all how suicide is the easy way out and is cowardly.” — Amy A.
“I was visiting my then-boyfriend’s parents in Savannah and his step dad made a comment about having issue with the current diversity of Georgia. So I came right out and asked: ‘Why, are you a racist?’ Well you can imagine that went over like a lead balloon.” — Tyler D.
“During a family holiday dinner, one person was telling us about their new exercise program and then actually stopped dinner so they could get up and demonstrate for everyone the type of squat they just learned. Then they made everyone else try it. You don’t want to see all your relatives squatting, trust me.” — Carrie S.
“My sister was describing to the family the worst present she’d ever gotten for Christmas. Everyone was laughing hysterically before they all realized it was from me.” — Jill G.
What’s the worst thing someone’s ever said to you at a holiday get-together?
More on the holidays
15 Christmas dinner ideas for guests with any kind of allergy
The coolest Christmas nail art spotted on Instagram
10 Gifts people born in the ’90s will totally appreciate