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A Woman’s In-Laws Are Furious That She Gave Her SIL ‘Very Honest’ Breastfeeding Advice & Reddit Can’t Even

For some parents, breastfeeding is an easy, enjoyable way of bonding with their newborn child. For others, it can be a painful struggle. Often, breastfeeding challenges prompt new parents to formula-feed their child, which is a totally valid choice. No parent should be shamed for keeping their child fed and healthy.

Alas, using formula instead of breastfeeding is still stigmatized in some parenting circles, which can be yet another source of stress for breastfeeding parents. Take it from this Redditor, whose “pro-breastfeeding” in-laws are upset that she gave her pregnant sister-in-law her honest thoughts about breastfeeding.

User @Rough-Ad-9762 turned to the infamous /AmITheAsshole Subreddit for some unbiased opinions on the whole kerfuffle. For context, she is a mother of three children and currently expecting her fourth. She only breastfed her oldest son, and she came to that decision because of “pressure” from her in-laws.

“My husband’s family are all staunchly pro-breastfeeding, to the point where those who don’t breastfeed or can’t can feel a little judged and uncomfortable around them,” the Original Poster explained. “It’s something they are always very open about and will bring up to any expectant mother they know, sometimes even ones they don’t know. It’s normally in the unsolicited advice category but sometimes can be intrusive.”

AITA for being very honest about why I chose to only breastfeed one of my children when my younger SIL asked?
by u/Rough-Ad-9762 in AmItheAsshole

“I was 26 when I had [my oldest son] and really hadn’t decided [on breastfeeding],” she continued. “But between my husband’s family members assuming and not listening when he told them it wasn’t a sure thing, and a nurse in the hospital I delivered at telling me I wouldn’t need a bottle or anything else because I would be breastfeeding as it was their policy, I felt a lot of pressure to do it.” Yikes.

OP quickly learned she did not like breastfeeding, hence why she has opted to formula-feed her younger kids and the child she’s expecting.

Overall, I felt like a walking cow,” she recalled. “There [were] no nice bonding moments when I was breastfeeding. … My husband told me it was okay to switch to formula if I wanted, but I heard so many negatives about formula I feared being judged harshly. I even tried pumping, but it was too uncomfortable for not enough reward.”

Luckily, OP’s husband is “a pro at telling his family to mind their own business,” so she hasn’t received any unsolicited advice from them regarding her choice to use formula.

And frankly, she shouldn’t! There is absolutely nothing wrong with using formula. At the end of the day, the decision to breastfeed or not belongs to a breastfeeding parent, not their in-laws.

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