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Shy girl’s guide to asking someone out

It’s not always easy to ask someone out on a date. In fact, the process can seem downright daunting for some of us. Rather than hope the guy you like picks up on enough hints to ask you out, or resign yourself to a date-free fall, follow our tips for asking someone out with ease.

Woman asking man out on date


It might sound silly, but the best way to feel ready to tackle asking a guy out is to know what you want to say and how you want to say it. That’s where practice comes in. Ask one of your BFFs to be your coach and then just simply try out a few different ways to approach someone you like. Loosen up and don’t worry about feeling embarrassed. Getting the jitters out with a good friend will make the real deal much easier. Plus your friend can help give you pointers on things like eye contact, body language and how direct you’re being.

Don’t overthink it

It’s just one date — not the end of the world. Being nervous is totally fine (and totally normal), but don’t overthink what you’re about to do. The less pressure you put on yourself, the smoother things will go, so let go of your apprehensions and relax. Speculating about what he’s going to say and whether or not you’ll be able to go through with it will just make you more nervous and uncomfortable.

Be direct

Once you’re ready to approach the guy you like, the best course of action is to be direct. Rather than beating around the bush or making awkward conversation, simply ask him what he’s doing tomorrow or next week or whether he wants to check out a band at the bar you both like. Remember what you practiced and project confidence. The more direct you are (while still smiling and being friendly), the easier it will be to ask someone out.

Have fun with it

What’s the worst that can happen? Sure, he could say no, but consider it more practice and have fun no matter what happens. If you go into the situation with a positive attitude, you’re much more likely to come across as laid-back and confident — attributes that are very likely to get you a date.

Tell us

What is your idea of a perfect first date? Share in the comments below!

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