Breaking up is only half the battle. Before you do the deed, you need to know for sure it’s time to move on, which isn’t always easy. Deciding to end a relationship usually involves a culmination of feelings, events and
issues that lead you to the ultimate conclusion that you no longer want to be with the person you’re with. To help you navigate the shaky shores of a relationship on the rocks, we’ve put together some of the biggest red flags that mean it’s time to move on.
You can’t see a future with him
There comes a time in your life when the person you’re currently dating has to really mean something. You have to feel like the time and energy you’re putting into the relationship is going to get you something in return — like a long-term commitment. If you can’t see past the short-term or no longer feel that you even want this person in your life past next week, it’s definitely time to breakup. If you stay with someone you don’t see by your side in the long-term, there isn’t any point in dragging the relationship out. In fact, it’s not fair to either of you and ends up becoming a waste of time and energy.
You’re moving in different directions
Whether you want kids and he doesn’t, or if he’s hell bent on moving to a farm and you’re a city girl, ending up on opposite ends of the spectrum takes its toll on love. If something comes between you that neither of you are willing to compromise on, breaking up often becomes the only option. When it comes to your biggest goals and lifelong aspirations, there is only so much compromising you can do before you end up resenting the other person, so realizing that you are moving in totally different directions usually spells trouble.
You feel more like friends than a couple
All love relationships are also friendships — most marriage or couple’s counselors will tell you that friendship is the foundation of your relationship — but that doesn’t mean chemistry goes out the window. If you now see your partner as just a friend, you may no longer be in love with him. There’s no doubt that you still love him, but being “in love” with someone means you still feel a physical as well as an emotional attraction to them. Not feeling any chemistry or physical pull is a good indicator you’re ready to breakup.
You prefer time spent without him
Once you get to the stage where any time you spend solo is a time when you’re happier than if you were with your guy, consider cutting ties. Spending time apart is important for relationship success, but you shouldn’t want to spend all your time away from your partner. If you do, there is something seriously wrong. Being much happier when you’re without him or when he’s away on business indicates the connection you once felt for him is long gone, and you’re now likely just going through the motions of being part of a couple. Rather than drag things out, find the courage to end the relationship.