One of the most frustrating things about trying to find love is that you could be sabotaging yourself without even knowing it. The choices you make, your beliefs about relationships, and the way you present yourself can cause romantic self-sabotage. Here are a few tips for minimizing self-inflicted dating damage.
Avoid emotionally unavailable men.
Some men just aren’t relationship material. These are guys who are either immature, selfish or unable (or unwilling) to commit — all of which can be categorized as emotionally unavailable. They may seem great on the surface, but they soon become more trouble than they’re worth. Going after guys like these is a waste of time and minimizes your opportunities to find real love with someone who is open, honest and emotionally available. Rather than putting your energy into trying to get, hold onto or change a guy who can’t function as part of a couple, cut your losses and move on.
Recognize when you need to let go.
Staying in a relationship that’s past its expiration date is a surefire way to end up emotionally exhausted. Remaining attached to someone for whom you no longer have feelings isn’t fair for either of you, and can cause you to miss out on other, better romantic opportunities.
Drop the air of desperation.
Just because you haven’t had a date in months or it feels like all of your friends are either getting married or having babies, don’t allow yourself to feel desperate. Remain confident that you’ll meet someone when the time is right, rather than feeling like you need to snap up anything with a pulse. Feeling desperate translates into acting desperate, which usually means ending up with guys who aren’t worth your time or who will take advantage of your vulnerable state. Keep your standards high and hold out for the right guy.
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