If you’ve been having a hard time making love last or finding a guy with whom you want to go on more than two dates, you may have to make some sacrifices — no, not intangible things like your apartment or your dog, but tendencies and bad habits that hold you back from finding love. Here are a few.
Your past relationships
To find new love, you must let go of the ghosts of relationships past. You may not realize it, but the effects a previous boyfriend had on you — positive and negative — could be shaping your idea of love and how you approach current relationships. Most people either compare potential partners to the one who got away (or broke your heart), or don’t trust anyone new because of how poorly they were treated in the past. Whatever your relationship baggage may be, let it go to find the love you deserve.
Are you still hanging on because you’re harboring resentment?
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Your need to be right
We’re not suggesting you dumb yourself down for a guy or agree with something you know is blatantly off base, but do try to curb your desire for total domination. You can’t always be right, nor are you always right. Don’t sabotage something great just because you can’t stand to lose.
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Your desire for perfection
If you’re holding out for the one guy who embodies total perfection, you’re going to be looking forever. Finding a guy who cooks and cleans, has a great job with a salary that means two vacations a year, is sensitive and gorgeous, and knocks your socks off in the bedroom would be amazing… but most men have flaws. If you’re hung up on finding a guy who meets every one of your 300 criteria, you’ll end up disappointed. If you want to find real love, let go of your desire for perfection.
Your need for control
A large part of falling in love is giving up a certain amount of control and allowing yourself to feel vulnerable. This can be hard for people who always keep their emotions in check no matter the situation — you know, those who don’t cry at weddings or sad movies. But if you really want to find love (and we know you do), you must let go a little.