Needing couples’ therapy doesn’t mean you’ve failed in some way or can’t cope with small arguments without professional intervention. It often just means you’re at an impasse and need some extra guidance to figure out which way to turn. We’ve come up with three signs that you could benefit from couples’ therapy.
You don’t listen to each other.
If you’re not going to listen to one another, nothing will ever get resolved. A marriage counselor or therapist can act like a referee to ensure you each get a turn to explain what’s bothering you or why you haven’t been wholly satisfied with the relationship lately. Actually allowing each other to speak and listening to what the other person has to say without judgement or immediate anger is a major step in resolving matters of the heart.
You fight constantly.
Sometimes, we get so caught up in needing to be right that we’ll do anything to get heard, including yelling when we should be communicating like adults. If one or both of you can’t seem to get a point across without having a full-blown fight, a counselor can help you communicate better — in a way that benefits, rather than burdens, the relationship.
You hold onto resentment.
Refusing to forgive your partner for whatever reason just makes things worse in the long run. Counseling can help you see why you’re having such a hard time letting go of your anger. Once you understand the reasoning behind your behavior, you will have a much easier time getting your relationship back on track — minus the resentment.