SheKnows.com got some advice from Tina B. Tessina, PhD, (aka “Dr. Romance”) psychotherapist and author of Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting about the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, on the behavior that can sabotage your twosome.
Avoid these Relationship mistakes
Making assumptions can hurt your relationship
Assuming that your partner thinks the way you do, and then getting angry when he or she doesn’t, can put undue strain on your relationship. If you don’t learn how to communicate, and find out what your partner thinks, you won’t be able to get along.
Overemphasizing sex can ruin your relationship
If sex is either too important, or not important enough to you, the relationship won’t have any juice, Dr. Tessina says. “Sex is one more form of relationship communication, and you and your partner need to work it out together. If you have hang-ups or unrealistic expectations about sex, and don’t address them, you won’t have a lasting relationship.”
Being too self-conscious can hurt your relationship
Hating yourself and being too self-conscious can be very frustrating for your partner. If you don’t like yourself, the other person will know, and eventually get tired of trying to love you when you feel unlovable and continually fend off his affection and compliments. Do your best to boost self-confidence, both for you and your relationship.
Focusing on the negative can be damaging to your relationship
If you whine, complain or feel sorry for yourself too often, you may become too much of a downer for your partner to handle. Learn to count your blessings, give compliments, and look on the bright side at least 75% of the time, suggests Dr. Tessina. “You’ll get what you focus on, and if you focus on misery, you’ll be miserable alone.”