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1-Minute antidote to “the honeymoon’s over” syndrome

Once upon a time, he was wonderful. He could do no wrong, nor could you. You stared lovingly into each others’ eyes, seeing only bliss. Your first months, years together were delicious. He couldn’t do enough for you. You received his every gift, touch and embrace with joy.

Keeping the romance alive

Now? Wonderful has become “You want to know what’s wrong with him? Let me count the ways!” You don’t have time to gaze into each others’ eyes, unless it’s to wonder when he grew that unibrow. He’s not at your beck and call anymore. Of course you love him, but why does he want to make love when you’re busy or exhausted?

Yup, the honeymoon is officially over. It ended when the rose faded from your love-tinted glasses, and his flaws became appallingly apparent. You trudge through your relationship, your marriage, figuring “Well, that’s just the way it is. Nothing much you can do about it.” But you’re wrong.

How to treat “the honeymoon’s over” syndrome

Take one minute to reinstate your honeymoon feeling. Close your eyes. Think back to that magical moment when something he did or said told you “He’s the one!” Really get into it. Feel that smile tug at your face? Feel the fun, the coolness, the tenderness of that moment?

OK. Now, when he’s at the computer, ignoring you, instead of thinking what a dufus he is and being irritated with him, flash on that magical moment.

Let it get to you.

Stick with it for a full minute.

Let it shift your critical eye.

You may give him a quick hug, a peck on the cheek or nothing at all.

Regardless, for a moment, you’ll have looked at him with honeymoon eyes. The more you do that, the more likely it is your honeymoon will return — for an hour, for a day? Who knows? Maybe ever after.

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