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The pros and cons of hiring family and friends as wedding vendors

It seems like a great idea: You have a friend who is a florist, you hire her to do your wedding flowers. You’ll probably get a discount and she’ll get some business. It may be a great idea, but there are also hidden pitfalls in this plan. Each situation is different, but offers these basic pros and cons to consider.

Hiring friends and family


  • You give a friend or family member some business.
    • It’s always nice to help out a friend, and what better way than by letting her show off her talents.
  • You have a vendor you can trust.
    • She’s a friend, you know she’ll get that wedding cake to the reception site on time!
  • You will probably get a discount.
    • Although she’ll have to pay her workers, and pay for her supplies, it’s possible that your friend will reduce her profit as a gift to you.
  • You’ll have someone going above and beyond the call of duty.
    • Hey, she’s going to be there, too. She’ll go the extra mile to make sure the rental companies come through for you.
  • It gives you a way to involve a friend in your wedding planning.
    • Not everyone can be a bridesmaid. This might be a good way to spend time with a friend you don’t see that often.


  • You may find it difficult to assert your own ideas with a friend who is a professional.
    • You have a certain idea in mind for your wedding bouquet, but she’s the professional. Will you be able to discuss this with her or will it devolve into a discussion of what happened when you didn’t trust her in high school?
  • She may be your best friend, but she isn’t necessarily great at her job.
    • She’s a trustworthy friend, but have you ever actually seen her wedding photography portfolio? Now would be a horrible time to find out that she’s not as good as she is nice.
  • If she gives you a substantial discount, your friend may feel taken advantage of.
    • Outsiders don’t always understand the costs wedding vendors pay. She may have a hard time saying no to your requests, but it may cost her in the end.
  • Your friend will be working instead of attending the wedding.
    • Even if her part of the event is over before the wedding starts, she’ll be there as the “invitation designer” not your friend from grade school.

More wedding tips

Find Local Wedding Vendors Near You
Vent About Your Family in the Wedding Forum
Wedding Etiquette and Other Questions

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