Calling all the single sistas! When it comes to dating in your 30s and staying on top of the game, there are certain rules to abide by to keep it fun, light and yes, oh so flirty.
Enjoy the ride
According to Elizabeth Webb love and lifestyle coach, owner of La Vida Femme, one way is to exude the same carefree attitude that you had in your 20s. Often women in their 30s are looking for the real deal when it comes to love: “If he is courting in a serious way, you must relax and enjoy the ride in a carefree fashion. It’s very difficult for men to fall in love and envision a future while the woman is acting urgent and anxiously looking at her watch.”
Of course, this means you have to show up and as Webb says, give him the WOW! While you have life experiences which are a huge asset, leave the “been there, done that” attitude at home. She notes, “Just because you’ve had the world’s best steak does not mean that one in front of you doesn’t deserve a WOW! Be easily impressed and very appreciative and he’ll be impressed with you!”
Get in the game
Another way to stay on top of the game is to be reminded of the basic guideline: you must get in the game! Lisa Ronis, matchmaker and dating expert in New York City, says to put the word out there to get set up. “Everyone knows someone … and you have to go out.” Even if it’s just a matter of making new friends and getting out of your comfort zone or going to the gym, you’ll need to focus on finding love and making it a priority. Her advice? “Get into it. The guy is not going to find you.”
Dr. Pepper Schwartz, chief relationship expert at PerfectMatch.com, recommends getting in the game via online matchmaking. “It’s like joining a gym,” she notes. “If you pay for it, you’re going to use it.” She also recognizes that women in their 30s have very busy schedules so another way to stay on top of dating is to incorporate it into your day. Whether it’s a coffee date or quick lunch date, you can fit dates into the daytime hours if need be.
And if you think you’re rusty or nervous to get on a date? Go on several. Seriously. Ronis explains, “If you have one guy, he feels all of the energy on him and it’s really scary. Date a few people so you’re more relaxed.” So whether you’re getting dolled up for a night on the town with friends once a week or simply going to the gym, always look your best. She adds “When you’re out and about having fun, it’ll feel like you’re in the game.”
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