3. Keep Him Out of the Loop
The funny thing about men is that telling them less about your life makes them long for you more. So as much as you might want to share the minutiae of your bitchy workplace or your take on the latest Grey’s Anatomy plot twist, hold back. “The hard truth is that from his end, that information is overwhelming and boring,” explains Douglas Weiss, PhD, author of The 7 Love Agreements. “Men don’t have the capacity to endure great amounts of detail. That’s one reason why they don’t give you the play-by-play of their lives.”
Edit your small talk and you’ll make a discovery: The less you tell him, the more interested he’ll become in your day-to-day, as Susan, 27, can attest. “If I’m vague or dismissive about what I’ve been up to — like ‘Oh, nothing. The usual. Work. Out with the girls’ — Dave becomes eager to hear the story,” she says. “And when he’s the instigator, he listens more closely.”
So to hook him in, when you’re chatting, give him the conclusion of the conversation first. For instance, “I got the job” or “I saw your buddy Mark,” and then stop and wait. You’ve gotten his attention, now let him draw out the details he’s dying to know from you.