For most people, talking dirty doesn’t exactly come naturally. Just like any other bedroom skill, the art of dirty talk is going to take some practice — along with a few super-awkward moments — until you find things to say during sex that feel right for you. If you’ve never painted a filthy picture with your words before, maybe it’s time to surprise your partner the next time you get down. Try one (or all) of these no-fail dirty talk shortcuts to maximize your pleasure and minimize your embarrassment.
1. His/Her name
It may seem basic, but they want to know that you’re not visualizing someone else when you’re with them or just phoning it in, so saying (or screaming out) his/her name in bed is a good way to ease into dirty talk. Punctuate it with a few “ooohs” and moans and it will be more than enough to heat things up.
2. How it feels for you
If you’re being a tad quiet, some partners will take the initiative and let you know what they’d like to hear by peppering you with questions, such as “What am I doing to you?” and “How does that feel?” In this case, simply describing the mise en scène and how you feel will suffice. However, don’t feel like obligated to use cuss words if it’s not your style. Instead, take a cue from romance novels and utilize under-used verbs like “pulse,” “swell,” and “throb.”
3. Your fantasies
Nothing counts when it’s said in between the sheets, so if you’re feeling confident, seize the opportunity and tell him/her all of your craziest fantasies. If the thought leaves you tongue-tied, try practicing in front of a mirror — especially the particularly naughty parts — until you are able to say them without feeling embarrassed or laughing.
4. Sexy phrases
Sometimes just having sex is intimate enough in a new relationship, and the idea of pouring out all of your deepest desires, is too much. However, you don’t want to be mute. For those times, any of the following stock sexy phrases will work:
- “Oh, yeah, right there!”
- “That feels amazing”
- “Don’t stop, harder”
- “I want you so bad”
- “Give it to me!”
- “You animal!”
5. Sound effects
Sometimes a little vocal encouragement is all that’s needed to let your partner know that you are enjoying what they’re doing. Sometimes a few soft purrs can be just as effective as a well-rehearsed speech, so don’t be afraid to get creative. Whatever you do to cheer them on will make your bedroom romp all the more exciting.
Originally published November 2008. Updated March 2017.